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whiteblackman

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whiteblackman

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 14 April 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 982
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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whiteblackman's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:59pm<b>skyregit</b> - the 09/05/2009 at 1:42pm

whiteblackman's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

whiteblackman's favorite FMLs

Today, I met a girl who's the whole package: brains, beauty, shared interests, great personality, single, and into me. Too bad I married my bitchy, depressive high school girlfriend who said she'd kill herself if I didn't. Sometimes, she still tells me she'll do it if we divorce. I believe her. FML

#6677904
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44741) - you deserved it (21382)

On 12/09/2009 at 8:27am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my greatgrandpa came over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, he pooped himself. My family went through the rest of the meal acting like we hadn't noticed to avoid embarassment. As it was coming to an end, my sister came home and immediately yelled, "Ew! Did someone poop?" He cried. FML

#6676147
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43116) - you deserved it (2667)

On 12/09/2009 at 2:39am - misc - by PoorGramps - United States (Texas)

Today, I pulled over to help an attractive girl on the highway in the middle of nowhere. When I asked if she needed help she told me she was going to try starting her car one more time. She then started to make fake engine noises and told me that she was good to go and that I should be on my way. FML

#6528104
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35849) - you deserved it (5323)

On 11/30/2009 at 2:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was shopping at the grocery market and was next in line. Behind me was a woman who only had two items, so I nicely let her in front of me, as it looked like she was in a hurry. When she was all rung up, she decided to pay her $16.45 in loose change which needed to be counted out. FML

#6510411
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29267) - you deserved it (5706)

On 11/29/2009 at 8:49am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML

#6508757
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24083) - you deserved it (12069)

On 11/29/2009 at 3:55am - misc - by Nomoresandwish (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my car crashed and the only refuge was at a nearby house, the resident of which was a crazy psycho. Now replace "crazy psycho" with "crazy ex-girlfriend who won't help you unless you compose a poem about how much you love her." FML

#6420890
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28379) - you deserved it (4327)

On 11/23/2009 at 11:40am - love - by worsethanzombies (man) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, I was a TA watching the class take a test. I didn't realize that the projector was still on while I was searching the Internet. They watched me google "chronic itchy anus". FML

#6287129
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10348) - you deserved it (47975)

On 11/13/2009 at 12:47pm - health - by yellowjacket_34 (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to purchase a brace for my sprained wrist. My wife and I had recently ran out of KY lotion, so I decided to pick up a bottle while I was there. It didn't occur to me that these two items could be perceived as being related until the cashier began to giggle. FML

#6285234
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24909) - you deserved it (5901)

On 11/13/2009 at 7:57am - misc - by joeheathen (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my girlfriend was throwing a birthday party and got very drunk. She needed help getting to the bathroom so I picked her up and walked her to the toilet. Assuming she needed to throw up, she instead takes a huge, monstrous crap right in front of me. I can't look at her the same ever again. FML

#6276981
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31541) - you deserved it (7905)

On 11/12/2009 at 7:05pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was informed by my boss that he has been stealing quarters out of my change bowl to pay for his bus rides. He makes six times the amount I make. FML

#6274623
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30841) - you deserved it (2062)

On 11/12/2009 at 4:40pm - work - by JBK06262009 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I auditioned for a part and made it because the director thought I would be "perfect" for the part and I was "just like the character in every way." The part is for a schizophrenic drug addict who everyone hates and is stabbed to death in the second scene. FML

#6274583
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26524) - you deserved it (3940)

On 11/12/2009 at 4:37pm - work - by Falafax (man) - United States

Today, I received an eviction notice taped to my door stating my landlord is selling his property and moving out of the country in 13 days. My landlord is my boyfriend. FML

#6273079
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39119) - you deserved it (2775)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:39pm - love - by LonelyMonkey (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was reading my students' Halloween stories I made them write for my creative writing class in high school. One of my students wrote about attacking me. She got my street address perfect and everything. FML

#6268890
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38714) - you deserved it (4021)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:17am - kids - by Teaching (man) - United States (California)

Today, I held a container while a patient tried to throw up in it. She missed. FML

#6268866
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24969) - you deserved it (2807)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:14am - work - by FML (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was playing football for my school. I had the ball and was running down the sideline. The guy behind pulled my flag off along with my shorts and boxers. I dove to try to escape and I happened to land on the hottest girl in the class who was on the sideline. I had no pants on. FML

#6265559
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30016) - you deserved it (4411)

On 11/11/2009 at 10:05pm - misc - by DangerZone (man) - United States (California)



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