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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I found out how mature the guy I'm seeing is. After sex, he took the condom off and hit me in the face with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19865) - you deserved it (4276)
On 03/07/2010 at 9:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, I was in my room, in my briefs and texting my girlfriend. Suddenly, I got a massive erection and I decided to take a picture to send her. As soon as my camera phone clicked, my mom walked in. You can see my mom in the picture screaming at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6158) - you deserved it (16391)
On 03/06/2010 at 1:10am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I decided to not go to a strip club for the second Saturday in a row, because I didn't want to appear desperate in front of the strippers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4932) - you deserved it (10893)
On 02/21/2010 at 1:08am - intimacy - by hayah - Sent from mobile version
Today, my long-distance boyfriend told me that he was going to pee on me to "mark his territory." When I told him that it was disgusting, he said, "last time, I just peed on you in the shower." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12731) - you deserved it (2059)
On 02/12/2010 at 8:34pm - intimacy - by rashree (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML
I agree, your life sucks (14771) - you deserved it (1929)
On 01/23/2010 at 11:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I took a picture of my "privates" on my girlfriends cell phone and set it as her background without her knowing. Minutes later, I heard her mom scream. She has the same phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4841) - you deserved it (21226)
On 01/22/2010 at 1:25am - intimacy - by masterzach21 (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was hooking up with a guy I just met. Things were getting hot and heavy and he asked me if I had a condom. I said no, and to which he replied "that's okay, we can just use a sock" and pulled his sock off of his left foot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17739) - you deserved it (3513)
On 01/20/2010 at 1:17am - intimacy - by ilovesocks (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I heard the sounds of women grunting in the living room. My husband knows I don't like him to watch porn, so I confronted him. He was masturbating to professional Women's tennis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7589) - you deserved it (12204)
On 01/19/2010 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by sportyhusband (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18737) - you deserved it (3427)
On 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by scubai (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was spooning with my wife when I said, "It's cold tonight." Previously when I used that line, my wife would respond by saying, "I know how to warm you up" and we would make love. Tonight, she said "I know how to warm you up" and farted on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17353) - you deserved it (5858)
On 01/12/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by cold-n-stinky (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, while my kids were taking a nap in the other room, I masturbated while Dora The Explorer was on. I think I need to get out more. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5708) - you deserved it (14253)
On 01/09/2010 at 1:38am - intimacy - by pervert (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11529) - you deserved it (3437)
On 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I woke up with bruised nipples because apparently my boyfriend likes to excessively play with them while I sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11695) - you deserved it (2197)
On 01/04/2010 at 6:30am - intimacy - by sore - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was snuggled in bed with my husband. He thought because my butt was twitching that I was trying to be frisky. So he slapped my ass hard in attempt to get something going. I was actually trying to hold in a huge fart because last night I had diarrhea. Apparently I still have it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17296) - you deserved it (2256)
On 01/01/2010 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by Lovergirl (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML
I agree, your life sucks (111859) - you deserved it (8897)
On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
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