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twilight_lupus

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twilight_lupus
  • Town/Country : Canada
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2728
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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twilight_lupus's favorite FMLs

Today, I had sex with a guy. As he was sleeping next to me, I checked his facebook messages and saw that he sent a message to one of his buddies asking what kind of lotion helps get rid of crabs. FML

#4051
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16178) - you deserved it (56200)

On 01/31/2009 at 10:04am - intimacy - by DDD - Sent from mobile version

Today, my parents told me that they received a letter from a prison. Being curious they opened it up and read the entire thing. It was from this girl I randomly met. Now I have a prison stalker and my parents think I date felons. FML

#3360
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16150) - you deserved it (2024)

On 01/29/2009 at 12:04pm - misc - by K Holed - United States (New York)

Today, my parents told me that they received a letter from a prison. Being curious they opened it up and read the entire thing. It was from this girl I randomly met. Now I have a prison stalker and my parents think I date felons. FML

#3360
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16150) - you deserved it (2024)

On 01/29/2009 at 12:04pm - misc - by K Holed - United States (New York)

Today, I was discussing my family heritage with my girlfriend's parents. The moment I told them that I came from a German background, her seven-year-old brother pointed at me and yelled, "HITLER!" FML

#3008
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17995) - you deserved it (1848)

On 01/28/2009 at 8:38am - misc - by razzmataz - United States (California)

Today, I found a deodorant spray underneath the counter of the snack place I work in, so give it a try to see what it smells like. It's currently the high season, and so I have quite a few clients standing in line in front of me, but it seems they'll now have to wait a couple of days for the restaurant to have all the remnants of the CS gas spray cleaned up. FML

#956
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4367) - you deserved it (15173)

On 01/11/2009 at 6:14am - work - by Xav_Cad - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, we were out smoking a bit of spliff just walking around. We saw a place to sit down in this little car park we were walking past. The cops came over and busted us. Turns out we were in the main car park for the cop shop. FML

#922
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4292) - you deserved it (34142)

On 01/10/2009 at 1:50am - misc - by karl - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was teaching a class but kids were chatting. After 3 soap box speeches about "The next person who talks gets a note to take home," one kid looked right at me and went "meow". FML

#891
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15084) - you deserved it (4786)

On 01/09/2009 at 3:54am - kids - by Liz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I received a really nice red satin set of underwear, with a bra, a thong and a corset... From my grandfather. FML

#725
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25718) - you deserved it (1701)

On 01/07/2009 at 6:43am - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version

Today, on her Facebook profile, my ex erased all the pictures where we were together, add her new boyfriend to her friends and changed her status to "I'm so happy". FML

#846
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16983) - you deserved it (4816)

On 01/04/2009 at 4:43pm - love - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, my philosophy teacher asked me about my parents. I replied that my mum was a cleaner and my dad was a bus driver. In an astonished voice, she said, "But, you're clever..." FML

#434
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25808) - you deserved it (1591)

On 12/02/2008 at 1:32am - misc - by lamb-chop - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I was taking my three year old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML

#142
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56299) - you deserved it (3240)

On 10/29/2008 at 7:57am - kids - by LifeSucks - Canada (Quebec)



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