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thegrealtdalton

Offline (the 08/23/2015 at 11:55pm) | Search for a member

thegrealtdalton

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 644
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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thegrealtdalton's page activity

Visits<b>trolled11</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 11:46pm

thegrealtdalton's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of thegrealtdalton's badges

thegrealtdalton's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my 17-year-old brother jerking it to a scene from the movie Frozen. Brain bleach, please. FML

#21390007
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35977) - you deserved it (3685)

On 04/08/2015 at 1:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I started lactating. That would be fine if I had a kid. Or was pregnant. Or wasn't 16. FML

Today, I was fired from job as a personal trainer. Why? Because I was working out with a friend while off-duty. Apparently, working out with a friend on a day off means I am training them under the table. FML

#21384707
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31390) - you deserved it (2569)

On 03/31/2015 at 12:47pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML

#21384025
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39489) - you deserved it (3519)

On 03/30/2015 at 6:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my son was at a birthday party. After eating a plate of cake, he loudly asked the birthday boy's mum if he could have sloppy seconds. I don't know where he heard that phrase, but the other kids' parents shot me very dirty looks. FML

#21369892
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28080) - you deserved it (2976)

On 03/07/2015 at 11:59am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my elderly neighbour told me why my other neighbours don't talk to me. I'm a massage/physical therapist and treat clients, mostly athletes, in my home. My neighbours saw the steady stream of young, buff guys coming to my house and concluded that I'm a gay prostitute. FML

#21327463
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33332) - you deserved it (2647)

On 12/30/2014 at 10:34pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I spent an hour painstakingly disassembling my antique mirror after discovering a stack of papers behind the back board. I finally got hold of one corner, and pulled out - a newspaper from 2007 and instructions for an IKEA bed. FML

#21286426
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28019) - you deserved it (4693)

On 10/27/2014 at 5:18pm - misc - by TukTuk (woman) - Germany (Sachsen)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

#21271608
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40573) - you deserved it (18367)

On 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, on my first day at as a photo editor at a print store, I had to spend over an hour editing a full shoot of a fat man eating a baguette in a bathtub, closeups included. FML

#21242471
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35740) - you deserved it (3439)

On 08/21/2014 at 1:39pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55483) - you deserved it (23081)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found a piece of erotic fiction on my brother's computer. It involved two lesbian teenagers, who just so happened to have the same names and physical descriptions as my sister and me. FML

#21233221
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43749) - you deserved it (4113)

On 08/09/2014 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I had to take a splinter out of my eight year old son's penis. FML

Today, I hurt my back, and now I have to lie on my stomach for twenty minutes every hour so I can ice the pain. My boyfriend won't stop using my ass as bongo drums every time. FML

#21127987
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42434) - you deserved it (7331)

On 05/01/2014 at 1:31pm - misc - by booty backfire - United States

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

#21127873
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49756) - you deserved it (4537)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, a would-be customer practically kicked my store door in, then got pissed and started throwing around insults after I told him that we were still closed, hence the closed sign. He claimed the sign was "confusing". FML

#21098658
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36244) - you deserved it (3022)

On 03/28/2014 at 4:11pm - work - by IDIOT (man) - United States



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