About supertacowaffle : Parkway Drive
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supertacowaffle's favorite FMLs
by gothchick201013 / 09/09/2016 at 2:43pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
Today, I got a call from my panicking grandmother. I asked her what was going on, and she explained that, “Godzilla doesn’t work.” Not really understanding, I asked her to clarify. “Yes, you know, Godzilla, to use the internet.” FML
by Grandzilla / 09/09/2016 at 12:10am / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Geek
Today, my boyfriend told me he only loves me sometimes. He explained what days he chooses to love me and what days he doesn't want to. I told him that's not how it works. He disagreed. He's 27. He still doesn't understand why this is a problem. FML
by Now What / 09/08/2016 at 1:04pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, I went on a blind date. Things got hot and heavy, but when he pulled off my pants and saw the Pittsburgh Penguins logo on my thong he stopped and told me to get dressed and that he refused to sleep with the enemy. He was a die-hard Flyers fan. FML
by Thatgirl112 / 09/07/2016 at 11:59pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
Today, at my new job, I realized I have been spending too much time with just my cat. As I passed some coworkers in the hall, I nodded and gave them the "slow blink of trust" that is used with cats. FML
by CoA / 09/06/2016 at 7:40am / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, I made quite an impression on my new bin men by forgetting to put the bin out 'til the last minute. I'm sure they enjoyed a good laugh at the woman in shorts, tank top and slippers struggling with a brolly as she slipped and slid while dragging her bin up a hill in a downpour. FML
by Impressionist / 08/25/2016 at 7:17am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by whoops / 08/15/2016 at 12:07am / United States (Tennessee) / Love
by HauntedTwilight / 08/11/2016 at 10:55pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, I walked into a wall, smashing my laptop into the top of my eye socket. This was all because I was carrying my laptop, phone and chocolate mug cake, all while trying to watch Netflix on said laptop. I feel like a 2016 cliché. FML
by justplaindumb / 08/03/2016 at 8:48pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up to an angry and threatening email from a porn company. Apparently, I took a sleeping pill last night and wrote a nasty email to the company about how they mistreat women. The best part: I used a web contact form instead of an email, so I have absolutely no idea what I wrote. FML
by damn you Ambien / 08/03/2016 at 1:48am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I learned that the hardest part of marrying a historian is choosing baby names. His top choices derive from two Roman magistrates, two abbesses, a tenth-century author, and an obscure Greek official. I already let him name our pug, for whom he chose the name "Tertullianus." FML
by NeitherHrotsvitNorErkembaldus / 07/29/2016 at 5:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by ENDmySUFFERING / 07/21/2016 at 11:25am / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Kids
by SkyrimGamerMoM / 07/14/2016 at 3:49pm / United States (North Dakota) / Geek
by married to a bipedal husky / 07/12/2016 at 5:52pm / United States (Florida) / Love