Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sarah2144

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

sarah2144

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9327
  • Number of comments : 205
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

sarah2144's page activity

Visits<b>xxmollyxx</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 7:59am<b>ARKHAM88</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 5:41am<b>nightlyblues86</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 6:56am<b>zoratheexplora</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 5:10pm<b>Infamous278</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 11:22pm<b>stalker181</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 9:46pm<b>Cheeser_Cheese</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 6:57pm<b>kingjohnson924</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 1:28pm<b>MysticAmmu</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 11:25am<b>Traitoro</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 2:14pm<b>Helldemon</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 4:18am<b>DeeTrain420</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 2:03am<b>snqr</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 2:10am<b>mooorgaann</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 3:33pm<b>ohishkabibble</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 8:11pm<b>catlady56</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 12:16pm<b>suoerkewl</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 3:20am<b>CDeCam</b> - the 01/12/2013 at 11:01pm

sarah2144's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of sarah2144's badges

sarah2144's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom walks into my room, with a serious look on her face asks me "When a man is getting it from behind, the man on top orgasms, but what happens to the man on bottom? Do you think he takes care of himself or what?" Hand motions were included. FML

#2736001
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78455) - you deserved it (5092)

On 06/09/2009 at 4:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

#2722142
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83944) - you deserved it (20416)

On 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by OhGeez (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

#2649932
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11734) - you deserved it (49531)

On 06/06/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by paranoid (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was driving on the motorway when a cop car made me stop. It was a routine check and when they said "Have you been drinking?" of course I said no. To that, my 6 year old sitting in the back screamed "Yes she did! She's lying I saw her drink!" I had drunk a milkshake. FML

#2593679
338 comments

I agree, your life sucks (100617) - you deserved it (6380)

On 06/04/2009 at 8:17am - kids - by Kimmiko (woman) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

#2459150
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22727) - you deserved it (75487)

On 05/31/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by deucelututi - United States (New York)

Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears. I had a cut on my ear close to the piercing and she thought that I had mistaken the cut for the opening, and said (as we walked past a car full of men), "Well of course it hurts when you put it in the wrong hole!". FML

#2045344
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68124) - you deserved it (7707)

On 05/18/2009 at 8:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I was coaching a little league soccer game. I was telling one of my players to go cover another kid. I said "go cover the little yellow kid!" because he happened to be wearing a yellow shirt. He also happened to be Asian. I then got death stares from his family members. FML

#2009898
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56965) - you deserved it (21402)

On 05/17/2009 at 9:48am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML

#1973147
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50658) - you deserved it (5808)

On 05/16/2009 at 7:26am - kids - by badmom101 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

#1815413
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75474) - you deserved it (8417)

On 05/10/2009 at 2:49pm - love - by airport (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I thought it would be funny if I put a 'Free if Hot-Wired' sign on my friend's car. I guess it worked. FML

#1766885
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7977) - you deserved it (76937)

On 05/09/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by t-dawg (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after practicing a song for my girlfriend on guitar all day, I called her over to my house to show it to her. After a long speech about how "this is for you," I played for about 3 seconds before I broke a string, which slapped her in her face. FML

#1694711
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63541) - you deserved it (5738)

On 05/06/2009 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: