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Perfectionist
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with the cliché of the diamond ring in a champagne glass. Apparently there was an off-duty police officer across the room watching me slip the ring into the glass. He thought I was slipping in a date-rape drug and tackled me down before I could propose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41226) - you deserved it (2794)
On 09/26/2009 at 10:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I woke up from a nap on my new bed to see my phone lit up with new texts. My friend sent out "Wanna test out my new bed?" as a mass text while I was asleep to every boy in my phone. Mark will be here in an hour, Jon wants to know what I'm wearing, and my ex's new girlfriend is not amused. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30425) - you deserved it (2507)
On 09/20/2009 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anathema_360 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was watching The Omen with my father. A little bit into the movie my dad turned to me and said, "Wow, you really looked like that Damien kid when you were little." Apparently I strangely resemble the anti-christ, and I am a teenage girl. Thanks Dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26166) - you deserved it (3181)
On 09/20/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was locked out of my house so I texted my cousin to come over and help me get in. She came over, stood on a chair and lifted me through the smallest unlocked window possible. Sadly, this was my bathroom window and I ended up head-first into my toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25950) - you deserved it (7101)
On 09/19/2009 at 8:08pm - misc - by GodDaughter (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53020) - you deserved it (2692)
On 09/13/2009 at 5:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, it was raining. I was out walking with my girlfriend, and decided it would be cute if we did a bit of dancing in the rain. As I was swinging her around, I swung her head against a lamp post. She broke up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33023) - you deserved it (14638)
On 09/08/2009 at 6:46am - love - by Charlie (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45355) - you deserved it (6401)
On 09/07/2009 at 9:32am - love - by GasAttack (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to explain to my father why most of the bar was giving him dirty looks at a concert. His air guitar motions made it look like he was jacking off under the table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28730) - you deserved it (1870)
On 08/30/2009 at 1:25am - intimacy - by Embarassed (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was supposed to give a presentation to the incoming freshman about the dangers of drinking in college. My co-presenter showed up drunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33996) - you deserved it (3744)
On 08/27/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was driving to work and I had to pee really badly. I am a teacher and my school was another 20 miles so I stopped on the side of the road. About halfway through, a bus full of laughing kids went by. They were all my students. My pants were down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11151) - you deserved it (31136)
On 08/21/2009 at 6:15pm - kids - by mrteacher (man) - United States (South Dakota)
Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40106) - you deserved it (123094)
On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I farted while I was in line at the bank. I tried to pretend it wasn't me by looking at the man behind me and turning back with a disgusted look on my face. I thought I had gotten away with it when the man yells "It wasn't me, this bitch did it". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6116) - you deserved it (72780)
On 08/19/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by moutz (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I farted while I was in line at the bank. I tried to pretend it wasn't me by looking at the man behind me and turning back with a disgusted look on my face. I thought I had gotten away with it when the man yells "It wasn't me, this bitch did it". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6116) - you deserved it (72780)
On 08/19/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by moutz (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, when we change positions, he shouts: "Power Rangers - Transform!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (50639) - you deserved it (9073)
On 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend humping my stuffed rabbit. I thought he was trying to be funny until I saw that he had an erection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52131) - you deserved it (3397)
On 08/16/2009 at 9:58am - intimacy - by bunny (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Friday 24 May 2013
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