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rebekahgriffith

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rebekahgriffith

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  • Number of visits : 77
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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rebekahgriffith's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with a guy I really liked. The date was going great until he decided to try flossing his teeth with my hair. FML

#20835321
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47187) - you deserved it (3828)

On 08/13/2013 at 12:07pm - love - by hairless by death - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Instead of moaning like any normal person, he just kept saying stuff like "uh-huh," "not too bad," and "yup" in a complete monotone. It was probably the most uncomfortable experience of my life. FML

#20804720
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64789) - you deserved it (6578)

On 07/26/2013 at 2:00pm - intimacy - by awkward (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the Giants game. During the seventh inning stretch they showed me on the jumbo-tron. It was just in time for the entire stadium to see me pull a tampon out of my purse. FML

#20799228
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59921) - you deserved it (7810)

On 07/23/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by GiantsFan13 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML

#20793994
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54706) - you deserved it (6340)

On 07/20/2013 at 11:45am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Delaware)

Today, after going out to dinner with my girlfriend, we went back to my place and things started getting hot. I went in the bathroom and put on a green condom. She wouldn't have sex with me because it looked "like a cucumber" and "cucumbers are nasty." FML

#20745688
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50099) - you deserved it (13806)

On 06/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by dan (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my mother came into my workplace to wail on me for "ruining our family's reputation" because I got a girl pregnant. I've been married to the "girl" for 8 years. FML

#20720453
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58634) - you deserved it (2894)

On 06/11/2013 at 10:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30767) - you deserved it (65496)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, I found out the hard way that I'm severely allergic to latex. FML

#20477547
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42705) - you deserved it (4239)

On 01/25/2013 at 1:11am - intimacy - by swollenpenis - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house having dinner with her and her parents. I was casually playing footsie with my girlfriend under the table, until her mom stopped eating and said, "You know that's my foot, right?" FML

#20170839
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9867) - you deserved it (28381)

On 11/20/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Brian (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

#19719938
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23420) - you deserved it (4794)

On 06/02/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by lol112 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while watching TV with my wife, I realized that we were still watching "My Little Pony" even though the kids had been asleep for half an hour. FML

#19495403
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20852) - you deserved it (5118)

On 04/19/2012 at 12:08pm - misc - by ajnmegs - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

#19475030
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19156) - you deserved it (36687)

On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada

Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML

#19263580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34799) - you deserved it (5445)

On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took off my sweatshirt in the middle of class. The tanktop I was wearing underneath went with it. FML

#18980998
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28913) - you deserved it (7319)

On 02/02/2012 at 11:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was talking dirty with someone on the phone, when at one point I said, "Oh yeah, you like that?" She responded, "I can't actually feel anything you know, we're just on the phone." FML

#18904031
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11123) - you deserved it (31314)

On 01/25/2012 at 12:00am - intimacy - by talkingtoaretard (man) - United States (California)



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