ralphvboy

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ralphvboy

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 9745
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ralphvboy's page activity

Visits<b>ShadowFlame275</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 12:57pm<b>WolfieTheBadass</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 8:37am<b>bleh028</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 12:10am<b>mattlw</b> - the 04/08/2013 at 6:04pm<b>greenie213</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 10:47pm<b>Catahoulaqueen</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 3:27pm

ralphvboy's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of ralphvboy's badges

ralphvboy's favorite FMLs

Today, tired of everyone forgetting my birthday, I traveled half way around the world to spend my 40th at a five star resort just to try and make it special. The hotel brought me a cake with someone else's name on it. FML

by nevercatchabreak / 08/31/2013 at 4:16am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I moved into my new place. It evidently used to belong to a hooker, because although I've only lived here for 9 hours, so far several different men have knocked on my door and asked if "Stephanie" is available for a good time. FML

by Anonymous / 08/31/2013 at 3:24am / United Kingdom (Redbridge) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

by fartz / 08/31/2013 at 2:04am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my crew and I were berated by a client for not installing her new hardwood floor on time. We were only halfway through the day, but apparently it should have only taken "like, an hour?" because "The guys on the TV shows do it that fast." FML

by smashyonewfloors / 08/31/2013 at 12:44am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. They thought it'd be hilarious to put on ridiculous accents and act like country hicks, spewing obscenities and strongly hinting that we're into incest. She soon left in disgust. I haven't heard back from her since. FML

by >_< / 08/30/2013 at 6:56pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me that he would leave me if I didn't seek help for my eating disorder. The eating disorder in question? Vegetarianism. FML

by itsellie27 / 08/30/2013 at 10:44am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health

Today, a man in a hurry asked me for a light. Not being able to find my lighter amongst the muddle inside my handbag, I handed him my lit cigarette so he could light his. He took it from me, started smoking it and walked off. FML

by Anonyme / 08/30/2013 at 6:59am / Miscellaneous

Today, I addressed my district manager as "Dude." FML

by goodbyepromotion / 08/30/2013 at 2:28am / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, a lady cussed me out for not bringing her salad and pizza to her table. She then wanted her money back. I work at a buffet; a self-serve buffet. FML

by pizza girl / 08/30/2013 at 12:33am / United States (Mississippi) / Work

Today, my mother yet again went on a long rant about how much of a loser I am as I have "never had boyfriend" and I'm 26. Truth is, I've been in the same relationship for over five years but it "doesn't count because he's black." FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2013 at 8:48pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I realized I love my boyfriend's cat more than my boyfriend. The only reason we're still together is I don't want to lose custody of the cat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2013 at 8:16pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I found out after spending my life's income on paying for my grandma's cancer treatment that she has been faking it. FML

by scammed / 08/29/2013 at 2:48pm / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2013 at 2:12pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, my mom bitched me out for not driving my little brother to school this morning. The reason I didn't is that some assfuck decided to slash my tires overnight. She was well aware of this fact. FML

by hope they slash you next, mom / 08/29/2013 at 1:37pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally received the bicycle I ordered months ago. It was an expensive custom-made bike which perfectly fit my 6'9" frame. Today, that bike got stolen. FML

by tallguy / 08/29/2013 at 9:40am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous