Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ralphvboy

Search for a member

ralphvboy
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3216
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ralphvboy's last visitors

WolfieTheBadassbleh028greenie213Catahoulaqueen

ralphvboy's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of ralphvboy's badges

ralphvboy's favorite FMLs

Today, the guy I love asked me if hooking up counted as dating, because he thinks I'm "super hot," but he doesn't want "all the relationship shit." FML

#20874228
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41985) - you deserved it (4525)

On 09/09/2013 at 8:46am - love - by Renagirl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, even after loving him unconditionally, my originally 340 pound morbidly obese husband, who within the past two years lost almost 200 pounds, left me because now, he "can do so much better". FML

#20874079
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68707) - you deserved it (3787)

On 09/09/2013 at 3:19am - love - by heartbroken - United States (California)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a public place before confessing that I've been seeing another woman, to avoid a dramatic scene. After being rushed to the hospital with a concussion and broken nose, I think it's safe to say my plan didn't go very well. FML

#20873101
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17613) - you deserved it (91960)

On 09/08/2013 at 3:31pm - love - by verbaltodomestic (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while working at Subway, I was about to take a guy's order. He quickly held up a hand and asked for someone else to make his sub, because he doesn't like "ugly people" touching his food. FML

#20871412
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48752) - you deserved it (3238)

On 09/07/2013 at 12:59pm - work - by /(•'_'•)\ (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out the unionized cleaning people that empty the garbage and clean the toilets make $19/hr and have more paid time off than I do with my college degree. FML

#20870911
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41198) - you deserved it (5270)

On 09/07/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48716) - you deserved it (17337)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, at a job interview, I was asked what I thought of twerking. It was a bizarre question, but trying to get on the interviewer's good side, I said I thought it was pretty cool. He snorted and said I'll be job-seeking for a while yet. FML

#20870423
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20528) - you deserved it (41041)

On 09/06/2013 at 5:23pm - work - by howprofessional (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the mother of one of my students bitched me out about her son's poor grades. He lazes around all day, paying no attention and being a constant nuisance. But, she says it's not his fault, and demands that I give him better grades so he won't get "self-esteem" issues. FML

#20870380
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43816) - you deserved it (2650)

On 09/06/2013 at 4:36pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, my car broke down. My dad insisted he could fix it, but screwed up in the process. After finally getting the car towed to a mechanic, I was told that I'd only needed a new water pump, but thanks to the damage my dad did, fixing it all will cost me a small fortune. FML

#20870135
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36538) - you deserved it (3039)

On 09/06/2013 at 12:10pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, while working at Home Depot, I was asked to cut some wire. When I asked her how much, she said, "From my computer to the wall". After explaining for a while that I didn't know how far that is, she left. FML

Today, I found out my grandfather died via Facebook, because apparently both my father and my aunt think posting a status about it immediately rather than calling family is the thing to do. FML

#20869986
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41779) - you deserved it (2358)

On 09/06/2013 at 8:10am - misc - by theblackrose23 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my 17-year-old son hacked off the legs of his bed with a saw. His explanation? "The bed looks cooler closer to the floor." FML

#20870098
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35770) - you deserved it (4267) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/06/2013 at 7:56am - kids - by Anonyme - France (Basse-Normandie)

Today, after 8 months of being belittled and treated like trash at my job as a prep cook in a high-end kitchen, I stood up for myself to the line cooks. Not only did everyone laugh at me, I got fired for causing a scene during service and insubordination. FML

#20869973
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33775) - you deserved it (8371)

On 09/06/2013 at 7:45am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, I had my first date in almost four years. Twenty minutes into our dinner date, I excused myself to use the ladies room. When I came back, not only was he gone, but there was also a security guard waiting to walk me out. I still have no clue why he left or why I got kicked out. FML

#20869864
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41660) - you deserved it (2202)

On 09/06/2013 at 2:42am - love - by thissinglelife (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to visit a client because his printer had broken down. After driving for an hour, then being screamed at about how horrible my company's service is, I walked over to his printer and found the problem: there was no paper loaded. FML

#20866213
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43333) - you deserved it (2334)

On 09/03/2013 at 3:50pm - work - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: