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postoso

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postoso
  • Town/Country : Santa Monica, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 881
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About postoso : Don't you be stalking me

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postoso's favorite FMLs

Today, whilst in an argument with my girlfriend, I told her she was the craziest bitch I'd ever met. She responded with "Challenge accepted." I'm now terrified. FML

#20139786
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8978) - you deserved it (37146)

On 10/30/2012 at 2:08am - love - by Andrew (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27213) - you deserved it (4237)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized that my life would make an excellent meme: Nerd girl goes to college, finally loses virginity; gets chlamydia. FML

#20106351
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28713) - you deserved it (8968)

On 10/07/2012 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by Unfortunate (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML

#20098468
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31365) - you deserved it (2395)

On 10/02/2012 at 3:39pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom decided the time was right to give me the sex talk. Towards the end, I had to excuse myself to the bathroom. As I came back, I overheard my dad telling my mom that I'm so unpopular, the only time I'll get laid is when I'm being put in a coffin. FML

#20091141
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30222) - you deserved it (2174)

On 09/27/2012 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by linn (woman) - United States

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37685) - you deserved it (2941)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was assigned to write a short story about what we imagine Earth to be like in 500 years, and daily conflicts people experience. My teacher loved it and read it aloud to the class. He asked for my inspiration, and I didn't have the heart to say that I ripped off Mass Effect 3. FML

Today, I was in a mall bathroom when two girls started making out in the stall next to me. Before I could leave, they got really into it and caused our shared wall to tear from its hinges and collapse on top of me. FML

#20067220
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31344) - you deserved it (2395)

On 09/11/2012 at 3:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, at work, I decided to make things more interesting, so when I called people I used a fake accent. As I was using an Australian accent, the person I was talking to asked me where in Australia I was from. I desperately replied, "Where the kangaroos are..." I'm now jobless. FML

#20011862
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4375) - you deserved it (23367)

On 08/09/2012 at 5:42pm - work - by sincerely depressed. - United States (California)

Today, I was at the mall, when a guy started screaming at his buddy for sleeping with his sister. It was pretty hilarious, so when he stormed off, I mockingly yelled, "Pussy!" He then whirled around and beat the absolute hell out of his friend. Now I feel like I'm going to reincarnate as a turd. FML

#20011677
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5721) - you deserved it (43921)

On 08/09/2012 at 3:51pm - misc - by feelsterrible (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

#19986519
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20501) - you deserved it (1552)

On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML

#19983789
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24459) - you deserved it (1862)

On 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm - work - by justlittleoldme - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35704) - you deserved it (7804)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my dad sat me down for a talk. After the talk, he wasn't my dad anymore. FML

#19942597
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38274) - you deserved it (1747)

On 07/15/2012 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML

#19938552
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30237) - you deserved it (3260)

On 07/14/2012 at 8:50pm - intimacy - by checkup (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)



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