Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Online | Search for a member
About patrickalamo : Ok I'm so obsessed with badges I started a Facebook group "FML Badges". It is a new page but it is there to seek and give advice on earning badges.
I got my very first FML posted and just thought everything got posted. However, 20+ failures there after.
A work in progress.
Yes, pic number two is Howard Stern dressed in drag... It is my favorite Christmas ornament.
If I viewed your profile you either had a cool comment or pic... Or I could have just been trying to figure out what was in your pick. More than likely I gave you a fuck, for no particular reason.
What are you still doing here go write some comments.
I like things a lot, 20 times in fact
You have liked 20 FMLs and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs that you have liked. We like that.
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.
The Thumb returns
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
Today, I was startled by my roommate marching a drunk man out of our apartment. Somehow he found his way in complete darkness into the bathroom without alerting me or my dog next to the only door. He mistook the clothes hamper for the toilet. FML
Today, my 3-year-old daughter came along, pointing a finger at me. I pretended to eat it by putting it in my mouth. She then said to me with disgust, "Why are you eating my booger?" Ah, that explains the saltiness… FML
Today, I was at a friend's birthday party when I got a call from my mom telling me to come home because my dog died. When I told my friend that I had to leave because of the loss, she replied with, "Okay, but you brought my gift inside, right?" FML
Today, I was telling my friends that I'd gotten a paid position to cover a worker's bereavement leave for the next three weeks. They then called me an insensitive bitch for 'profiting from someone else's misfortune'. FML
Today, I was given my yearly evaluation as a cake decorator at Walmart. They said I "was easily the best decorator there" and "the bakery has definitely improved since I got there." In the same conversation they put "unsatisfactory" on my evaluation and denied my raise. FML
Today, I had a talk with my daughter about how I hope her first boyfriend is a special one because 'spending the night' with a boy is a big deal. She replied with a giggle, "Mom, I lost my virginity in a parking lot three years ago!" FML
Friday 27 March 2015