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maximus_prime

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maximus_prime
  • Town/Country : Australia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 265
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About maximus_prime : Hey, I live in Brisbane, Australia. Love to read the stories and comments posted, lots of witty ppl contribute :-)

maximus_prime's last visitors

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maximus_prime's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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maximus_prime's favorite FMLs

Today, my school received the ranking for state tournaments. We're last. Our cheerleaders are too embarrassed to cheer for us. FML

Today, and for the third time this week, I found a pubic hair in my soup. I'm currently bed-ridden and can't afford to piss off my boyfriend by complaining. FML

#21054632
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37460) - you deserved it (4367)

On 02/08/2014 at 5:14pm - misc - by vey (woman) - China (Beijing)

Today, I was driving along when I noticed a kid struggling to push his car up the crest of a hill. I jumped out to help him, and he acted surprised to see me. Once we got the car over the hill, it rolled on down. I then saw that no one was actually in the driver's seat. I'd helped a vandal. FML

#21052299
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41478) - you deserved it (7505)

On 02/06/2014 at 11:54am - misc - by Delanto - United States

Today, my sister found out that Justin Bieber got arrested and now she won't stop crying. 5ML

#21037837
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41895) - you deserved it (4962)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:28am - misc - by Estee1024 - United States (California)

Today, my students unanimously agreed, in front of me, that the only reason they take my course is to look at my ass. FML

#21028396
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50657) - you deserved it (11278)

On 01/15/2014 at 12:54am - intimacy - by jseid2 - United States (California)

Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML

#20989946
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44464) - you deserved it (4885)

On 12/12/2013 at 6:27am - love - by Rumors - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45418) - you deserved it (6890)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45418) - you deserved it (6890)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, for the third time since breakfast, I accidentally walked in on my father wanking. FML

#20870154
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45092) - you deserved it (4743)

On 09/06/2013 at 12:48pm - intimacy - by jesus christ, dad (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I found out that if I say "make a sandwich", it doesn't matter what context it's in, or whether it's a command or just me describing my day; I'll be yelled at anyway by my hipster roommate for being a "sexist cunt", then end up apologizing just to get her to shut up. FML

#20868968
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34467) - you deserved it (4921)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I asked out a guy at work that I really like. He just stared at me and said, "Honestly? I'd rather smash my balls with a mallet. No offense." FML

#20828908
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46552) - you deserved it (3807)

On 08/09/2013 at 10:54am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, my husband and I were fooling around, and things got heated. In the heat of things, I told him to tear my panties off. He took it literally and yanked at them with all his might. It's been two hours and I still can't walk straight. FML

#20827713
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45757) - you deserved it (17114)

On 08/08/2013 at 6:15pm - intimacy - by fuck my arse (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML

#20818899
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49556) - you deserved it (6507)

On 08/03/2013 at 4:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Portugal

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

#20813339
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49447) - you deserved it (7868)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Belgium (West-Vlaanderen)

Today, while arguing with my newly ex-girlfriend over how she cheated on me with a mutual friend, she tried to wash her hands of any guilt, saying that I was "selfish" and "just slut-shaming, really". FML

#20796093
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40218) - you deserved it (3227)

On 07/21/2013 at 5:49pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)



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