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juliaannw's favorite FMLs
Today, I was fooling around a bit with my girlfriend while cooking dinner when she said, "Don't get too excited, I want to watch The Princess and the Frog tonight." I just got cockblocked by a Disney movie. FML
by roberto / 11/12/2010 at 6:48pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/12/2010 at 4:31pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, someone in my class wrote "Erase me if you can!" at the very top of the board, as I am always tormented about how short I am compared to everyone else. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't reach it. I'm the teacher. FML
by Petitprof / 11/12/2010 at 1:23pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML
by youreajoker / 11/10/2010 at 5:28am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
Today, I went into a haunted house. Around 30 seconds into the adventure, I couldn't stop screaming at the top of my lungs from all of the scares. Suddenly, the little girl ahead of me, who was all by herself, turned around and told me to "suck it up and grow a pair, loser." FML
by Anonymous / 11/01/2010 at 7:56pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/17/2010 at 2:28am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by unloved / 10/14/2010 at 6:10pm / Australia (South Australia) / Work
by Anonymous / 10/04/2010 at 5:42pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy
Today, I was watching TV with my grandpa, and he stopped flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote landed on my stomach as my mom and grandma walked in. They yelled at me for being a pervert for an hour, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML
by Andrew / 09/24/2010 at 6:22am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, after waiting all day to get into my favorite band's concert, I got front row. At the end, one of them grabbed my CD and got the whole band to sign it. The last band member tossed it into the crowd, nowhere near me. FML
by lovedontlivehere / 09/23/2010 at 7:49pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, a crying kid was brought to my attention by a customer. He was so upset from losing his mom that he couldn't say his name or his moms name. I took him around the store asking him to point out his mom. Once we found her she told me "I was hiding from my kid to test his independence." FML
by Anonymous / 09/19/2010 at 12:27am / Canada (Quebec) / Work
by huwauw / 09/17/2010 at 4:33pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/17/2010 at 7:36am / United States (Kansas) / Health
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he would do if I were to get pregnant. Expecting him to give me a cute and supportive answer, he replied, "We'd be finding you a nice flight of stairs to accidentally fall down." FML
by vikinggirl / 09/13/2010 at 5:14am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…