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jadenann

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jadenann's favorite FMLs

Today, while having sex with my wife, my Candy Crush addiction hit me full force, and all I could do was think about possible moves I could make in the level I'm stuck on. FML

#20890032
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22759) - you deserved it (45466)

On 09/21/2013 at 11:09am - intimacy - by CandyCrushAddict (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was at a pool party with some friends. We decided to play chicken and I was on the shoulders of the guy I like. Right as we started playing, for some unearthly reason my body decided to let out a little pee. I thought he wouldn't notice since we were already wet. He did. FML

#20804466
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52147) - you deserved it (16867)

On 07/26/2013 at 10:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boss gave me an autographed photo of himself after he heard that I think he's intimidatingly attractive. FML

#20743881
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36889) - you deserved it (8669)

On 06/24/2013 at 1:20am - work - by myfavoritesgouda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20283) - you deserved it (7836)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I heard of an inevitable world-wide bacon shortage on the news. FML

#20089182
394 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27599) - you deserved it (4902)

On 09/26/2012 at 2:57am - misc - by bacon lovers worst nightmare - United States (California)

Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML

#20027548
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37609) - you deserved it (2166)

On 08/18/2012 at 1:15am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got a text from my mom saying, "I heard the cupcake store got robbed. Where are you?" Then she texted back, "Oh never mind, they wanted money, not cupcakes. It wasn't you." Very funny, Mom. FML

#19062994
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23481) - you deserved it (4464)

On 02/13/2012 at 2:09am - misc - by cieee - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home to find my house destroyed. I was so devastated, I cried. I had spent days hand-crafting the house to perfection, down to the finest detail. On Minecraft. FML

Today, my boyfriend proposed. The ring just had a piece of graphite on it. My boyfriend argued that since graphite and diamonds are both just forms of carbon, it is the same thing. FML

#12899907
404 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31116) - you deserved it (12298)

On 09/04/2010 at 10:08am - misc - by pencilring (woman) - United States

Today, is the first weekend I have off this summer. Instead of letting me see my friends, my dad printed out a practice SAT exam. I've already taken the SAT. He just "doesn't want me to get rusty". FML

#11312975
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31113) - you deserved it (3147)

On 06/19/2010 at 2:53pm - misc - by Classicmen - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was helping my friend put up a wooden fence at his new house. I was holding the sections of fence up while he nailed them in with an air powered nail gun. The gun malfunctioned and fired twice putting the second nail through my hand and into the wood. We had to pry the nail out. FML

#7412536
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30463) - you deserved it (2374)

On 01/18/2010 at 1:09am - misc - by Nissan_David (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out my class was attempting to raise money for me through a bake sale because some girl spread a false rumor that I was raped and that my father was going to disown me. The whole school believes it and my biology teacher took me aside and asked if I needed someone to confide in. FML

#3806644
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59987) - you deserved it (2641)

On 07/16/2009 at 4:32pm - misc - by dork (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I'm on vacation. I spent $4000 to surprise my boyfriend on a trip to Hawaii. We have been together over a year. Turns out, he hates the outdoors. He's mad at me for bringing him here and is upset at everything. He's in the room reading, I'm at the bar drinking $10 Mai Tai's. FML

#2062305
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50171) - you deserved it (15556)

On 05/18/2009 at 9:11pm - misc - by Fubar0906 (man) - United States (Oregon)



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  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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