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i_wuz_nver_here

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i_wuz_nver_here
  • Town/Country : Seattle, Washington,, America
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13894
  • Number of comments : 571
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About i_wuz_nver_here : I was bored so I made this account. Hi.

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i_wuz_nver_here's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was in the shower, my curious cat jumped in. She decided she really doesn't like showers and to avoid getting wet, used my naked body as a makeshift tree. FML

#16467206
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26633) - you deserved it (3113)

On 06/02/2011 at 12:06pm - animals - by brittaneejanex - United States

Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML

#16464729
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12715) - you deserved it (30606)

On 06/02/2011 at 6:05am - misc - by ohcrap - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I fell asleep in class. I'm the teacher. FML

#16450721
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12881) - you deserved it (39210)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:05pm - work - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

#16449288
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61487) - you deserved it (3348)

On 06/01/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by aarone23 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found out what getting slapped in the face with lettuce feels like. FML

#16367769
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23480) - you deserved it (6812)

On 05/27/2011 at 1:26am - misc - by moe - United States

Today, I had to explain very slowly to my mum why she cannot put metal cutlery in the microwave. She did it anyway. FML

#16354209
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27340) - you deserved it (2383)

On 05/26/2011 at 5:48am - misc - by smarterthanmymum - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my mom trying to wax her butt. FML

#16351736
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41575) - you deserved it (5742)

On 05/26/2011 at 12:15am - intimacy - by blahblah493 - United States

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from my biological father, who I have never met in my life. As I was scrolling through his hobbies and interests, I saw "Drinking," "Black women with big asses," and "Getting laid, lol." FML

#16344639
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43519) - you deserved it (3290)

On 05/25/2011 at 4:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I had to explain to my sobbing teenage daughter why you can't get pregnant from masturbating. FML

#16331288
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45794) - you deserved it (6807)

On 05/24/2011 at 6:29pm - intimacy - by asnolt (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boss called me into his office to proudly show me about an hour's worth of videos of his recent holiday. The videos were all of goats and cows eating grass outside his window in Pakistan. FML

#16324366
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25362) - you deserved it (2883)

On 05/24/2011 at 3:31am - work - by goatvideosarelame (man) - Singapore

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31243) - you deserved it (4718)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

#16277810
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52236) - you deserved it (7877)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

#16277810
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52236) - you deserved it (7877)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)

Today, I went over to a guy's house for dinner. He ended up getting really drunk and started crying, telling me that I reminded him of his dead ferret. Distraught, he tearfully showed me her ashes. FML

#16271317
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32390) - you deserved it (4487)

On 05/20/2011 at 7:33pm - misc - by SophieGray - United States (New York)

Today, I went over to a guy's house for dinner. He ended up getting really drunk and started crying, telling me that I reminded him of his dead ferret. Distraught, he tearfully showed me her ashes. FML

#16271317
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32390) - you deserved it (4487)

On 05/20/2011 at 7:33pm - misc - by SophieGray - United States (New York)



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