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i_wuz_nver_here

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i_wuz_nver_here
  • Town/Country : Seattle, Washington,, America
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13760
  • Number of comments : 571
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About i_wuz_nver_here : I was bored so I made this account. Hi.

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i_wuz_nver_here's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
502 comments

I agree, your life sucks (117021) - you deserved it (5932)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML

#17088457
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28836) - you deserved it (6174)

On 07/13/2011 at 12:43am - kids - by ohno - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend and I came across the topic of school while chatting. He asked me what high school I went to and where I moved from. I have lived here my whole life, he was my crush for four years, and was in my classes throughout those years. He doesn't believe me. FML

#17085145
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30133) - you deserved it (2578)

On 07/12/2011 at 8:51pm - love - by steph2052 - United States (Washington)

Today, I took my mom to Victoria's Secret to help her find a bra. She made me try one on to see if it looked good on me. Turns out we have the same cup size. I'm a guy. FML

#17080127
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17450) - you deserved it (43637)

On 07/12/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by sm702 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my father spent half an hour trying to convert my cat to Christianity. He has already done this with my other two cats. He's completely serious and thinks they are born-again Christians. FML

#17072330
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27738) - you deserved it (2605)

On 07/11/2011 at 10:15pm - animals - by CatOwner (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my father spent half an hour trying to convert my cat to Christianity. He has already done this with my other two cats. He's completely serious and thinks they are born-again Christians. FML

#17072330
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27738) - you deserved it (2605)

On 07/11/2011 at 10:15pm - animals - by CatOwner (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my mom cooked her dog some potatoes, carrots, beef, rice and peas. She cooks better food for her dog than she will for our family. FML

#17039633
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28291) - you deserved it (2983)

On 07/09/2011 at 10:34am - animals - by iGreen - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my family got together to read my grandpa's will. He gave all of his grandkids $400 each. Except me. It seems he thought I'd see the funny side in being bequeathed a blow-up sex doll. FML

#17027029
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33880) - you deserved it (4410)

On 07/08/2011 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Jack - United States (Illinois)

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

#17023204
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30927) - you deserved it (3405)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:23am - misc - by Yoda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for 3 years. She's pregnant. I'm a virgin. FML

#17023153
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45903) - you deserved it (8355)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:19am - love - by Nick (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML

#17001302
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7151) - you deserved it (65717)

On 07/06/2011 at 2:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my dad came home from work complaining about all the people he'd seen. He said he doesn't understand why so many people with problems have to confide in him. He's a psychologist. FML

#16999068
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26594) - you deserved it (2549)

On 07/06/2011 at 10:52am - misc - by siighh - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML

#16993109
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28631) - you deserved it (2740)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:54pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I got trapped in a glass elevator at the mall. My father walked right by the elevator, laughed and went into a store. A fireman got me out. FML

#16990171
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28872) - you deserved it (2845)

On 07/05/2011 at 6:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my mom took me to a counselor because of my addiction to watermelon. FML

#16990029
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29120) - you deserved it (5081)

On 07/05/2011 at 6:28pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)



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