Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

i_wuz_nver_here

Online | Search for a member

i_wuz_nver_here

96Fucked!

i_wuz_nver_herei_wuz_nver_here
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 January 1998 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 16094
  • Number of comments : 633
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About i_wuz_nver_here : I was bored so I made this account. Hi.

Photographer, student, lover of life.

i_wuz_nver_here's page activity

Visits<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 10:56pm<b>hoosiergirl94</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 11:13am<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 11:59am<b>ohshawna</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 10:42am<b>Kuibe</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 3:48am<b>AndesFults</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 11:24pm<b>evanfroach</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 10:27pm<b>SourPatchTeen</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 12:30am<b>kawayi</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 5:02pm<b>Doghatesme</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 2:45pm<b>FYLTHOUGH</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 4:22pm<b>UnluckyHoax</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 12:10am<b>Rainbowkupkake</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 11:12pm<b>ScottVining</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 12:01pm<b>FalloutScrolls</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 8:49pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 11:20pm<b>krstnngd</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 4:49pm<b>PencilTips</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 8:02am

Fucked!<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 4:56am<b>ohshawna</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 4:42pm<b>AndesFults</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 5:24am<b>FYLTHOUGH</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 11:48am<b>earljonez</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 8:53pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 7:06pm<b>StormfrontX33</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 9:00am<b>EmperorChowilio</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 6:31am<b>HOUSTON112</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 2:58am<b>ElZedonky0327</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 2:12am<b>Holijust</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 8:28pm<b>ImagineCrazy</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 6:56pm<b>SecundusSecunda</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 2:24am<b>thunderfucked</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 12:06am<b>TreeTreeMan</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 6:32am<b>pks2014</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 3:00am<b>bwoolf96</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 2:51am<b>orios105</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 2:45am

i_wuz_nver_here's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of i_wuz_nver_here's badges

i_wuz_nver_here's favorite FMLs

Today, my band informed me that our gig this afternoon was actually a wedding. Whose wedding? My ex-wife's, along with the guy she cheated on me with. For their first dance, I had to sing what used to be our song. FML

#20844435
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81039) - you deserved it (4564)

On 08/19/2013 at 9:06am - love - by Love stinks (man) - United States

Today, I found out that if someone flushes a toilet the same time I'm starting the washing machine, my house will flood. FML

#20844207
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43599) - you deserved it (2727)

On 08/19/2013 at 2:21am - misc - by Ben - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for years. There was just one problem: it was so terrible I said, "I think I might be straight" about five minutes in just so it would stop. FML

#20844009
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49638) - you deserved it (15159)

On 08/18/2013 at 11:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was watching TV with my boyfriend, when a weird wart-removal ad came on. He watched in disgust as the lady's wart said rude things to her. Then he looked at me and said seriously, "I'm glad yours don't talk..." FML

#20842136
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43021) - you deserved it (4657)

On 08/17/2013 at 8:27pm - love - by WartCream - United States (Kansas)

Today, my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once, twice. FML

Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML

#20841455
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48454) - you deserved it (7768)

On 08/17/2013 at 6:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I watched TV in the early morning. I was watching The Ring, and when the scene came on where the girl is crawling out of the TV, my dad grabbed my shoulders from behind me out of nowhere, causing me to shriek like a little bitch. I don't know how long he waited to do that. FML

#20838885
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46037) - you deserved it (8133)

On 08/15/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by insomniac x2 (woman) - Mexico (Nuevo Leon)

Today, while discussing career prospects with my mom, she suggested that I become a penis puppeteer, because "Let's face it, you play with it 24/7. Why not make a career out of it?" Yeah, thanks. FML

#20838688
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38630) - you deserved it (12824)

On 08/15/2013 at 12:49pm - work - by kaynotentirelywrong (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my dad, under threats of disowning me, insisted that I offer my sister a job in my company. I run my own law firm, she is a hairdresser. FML

#20838513
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52746) - you deserved it (3417)

On 08/15/2013 at 9:34am - work - by lawman (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, it was my birthday. I spent all day in bed, sick with the flu. My boyfriend then broke up with me by text, because he didn't want to risk getting sick by doing it in person. FML

#20838443
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54240) - you deserved it (3295)

On 08/15/2013 at 7:28am - love - by Rachel8896 - United States (Washington)

Today, I was told that my son has Twitter and Facebook accounts that he uses to try to bully people online, some of which are celebrities. He does it really badly, though. FML

#20837780
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40438) - you deserved it (7059)

On 08/14/2013 at 10:02pm - misc - by ShitStirringSon (man) - United States (California)

Today, my sister admitted to selling pages of my diary to my old boyfriends. FML

#20837392
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48368) - you deserved it (3995)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:13pm - kids - by sisterly love - United States (California)

Today, a guest of the private beach club I work at asked if I could do something about the water temperature in the ocean. I laughed, thinking it was a joke. She was serious and complained to my boss, saying I was absolutely no help. FML

#20837266
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45844) - you deserved it (2847)

On 08/14/2013 at 3:47pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding and everything was going perfectly as planned. That is, until a bird flew over us and left a present right between my boobs. I had to stand at the altar for 30 minutes as bird poop melted in my cleavage. FML

#20837089
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59017) - you deserved it (5375)

On 08/14/2013 at 1:39pm - misc - by NewBride (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my 16-year-old brother managed to convince my 22-year-old boyfriend that I breastfeed my pet parrot. FML

#20835369
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51807) - you deserved it (5278)

On 08/13/2013 at 12:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: