hollywoodt1ts

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hollywoodt1ts

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 30 May 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1771
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About hollywoodt1ts : I grabbed life by the horns, broke the bull's leg, and lived to tell the tale.
in other news, I am an avid FML reader. I'm on here at least 4 times a day.
my profile picture is definitely hilarious because it contains a guy with a muffin on top of his head and is in the picture with a girl who has a muffin top. HA!!

enough said.

enjoy my day to day comments.
down right favorite poster on here is DocBastard
trying to keep up with him is like running a three legged race with only a peg leg and a cane.

hollywoodt1ts's page activity

Visits<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/22/2015 at 10:41pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 8:16pm<b>maelynn11</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 10:42pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 9:30pm<b>bazzers</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 4:10am<b>Chris93Jones</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 12:24am<b>treschicmylove</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 12:07pm<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 7:37pm<b>chrisiffer</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 7:23pm<b>nissanleaf</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 6:30pm<b>sparkin</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 6:20pm<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 4:06pm<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 3:44pm<b>mareenadegler</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 2:31pm<b>bfsd42</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 4:25pm<b>Tim2415</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 11:58pm<b>Kateyez_26</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 12:07pm<b>blackwidowtaco</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 2:53am

hollywoodt1ts's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of hollywoodt1ts's badges

hollywoodt1ts's favorite FMLs

Today, I was lying naked on my boyfriend's bed for the first time ever. He glanced at me, then started playing with a Rubik's cube. FML

by someone / 09/17/2013 at 12:38pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I told a guy he should be ashamed of himself for parking in a handicapped space. He hit me with his prosthetic leg. FML

by Anonymous / 09/10/2013 at 9:23am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at the zoo, I found out that the rhinos there can pee backwards, while standing directly behind one. FML

by Are you kidding me? / 09/09/2013 at 4:51pm / United States (Kansas) / Animals

Today, I woke up and found $30 slipped under my door with a note that read, "Please buy yourself a quieter vibrator. -Mom and Dad." FML

by anon / 09/09/2013 at 11:15am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, after my grandma did some early Halloween costume shopping, I witnessed her modeling a "sexy nurse" outfit. After seeing her bare thighs and most of her ass, I don't think I can eat cottage cheese ever again. FML

by fuck my liBLARGHSLJNAdlajdSzxz / 09/05/2013 at 12:39pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy

Today, my car window got smashed, because someone somehow confused the doll my daughter always leaves strapped into a carseat for an actual kid. It's a cabbage patch kid. FML

by mother to an ugly doll / 09/04/2013 at 2:10pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, I explained to my roommate that if she kept using all of our kitchen utensils as sex toys and hoarding them because of the varying degrees of orgasms she could achieve, we wouldn't be able to cook or eat in our own house. FML

by Palindromesque / 09/04/2013 at 5:07am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I received an email from my professor asking me not to jump ahead on assignments as it makes the other students look bad. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 1:14am / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML

by frustrated / 08/17/2013 at 6:56pm / Ireland (Kerry) / Intimacy

Today, I received a phone call that started with, "Now stay calm... Your house is on fire." FML

by Anonymous / 08/12/2013 at 10:54pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home a little earlier than usual, only to walk in on my dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from my mom's mouth. FML

by NO NO NO / 08/05/2013 at 5:42pm / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Intimacy

Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML

by um... what the fuck, miss? / 08/02/2013 at 4:23pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2013 at 7:19pm / United Kingdom (Falkirk) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend and I were spooning in bed, nude, when I accidentally farted. He freaked out and asked in all seriousness if I was trying to give his dick pink-eye. FML

by -_____- / 07/31/2013 at 5:23pm / Netherlands / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend suggested that we become "drug dealers" because I'm a chemistry student and he's seen a few episodes of Breaking Bad. FML

by Bnewlove / 07/31/2013 at 12:50am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love