hollylollyxoxo

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hollylollyxoxo

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 4 May 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2310
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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hollylollyxoxo's page activity

Visits<b>SuperDani</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 11:19pm<b>jeff_zz</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 4:07pm<b>Palan541</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 1:40pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 5:44pm<b>BonerFart</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 7:53pm<b>holly_fly</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 10:40pm<b>jill97</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 10:12am<b>heroqucas</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 5:07am<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 11:48pm<b>Halpak</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 8:26pm<b>ThisIsMyUsernam</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 11:10pm<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 12:41am<b>crishale</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 8:53am<b>pikachu_43</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 6:03pm<b>velocityraptor</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 5:52pm<b>nickdailey</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 10:42pm<b>xokpxo</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 4:12am<b>manateesarecool</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 7:30pm

hollylollyxoxo's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

hollylollyxoxo's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife created a "Points Reward" system for the privilege of sex. 10 points for doing the dishes, 20 for the laundry, etc. How many points do I need before I can have sex with her? 2300. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2011 at 10:59am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend called my vagina "Chewbacca". FML

by fffmmll / 03/21/2011 at 12:58pm / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy

Today, someone rear-ended me while I was on my way home. I was extremely upset and I called my boyfriend for comfort and to help inspect the damage. After taking a good look at the car, he said, "Damn, if only you fucked this hard." FML

by emm / 03/18/2011 at 12:11pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was spending Saint Patrick's Day with my girlfriend, when she started pinching me for not wearing green. To my complete shock, when she pinched my nipple, I got the biggest, most noticeable erection I've ever had in my life, and no matter what I did, it wouldn't go away. We were in public. FML

by Mr. Sensitive Nips / 03/17/2011 at 6:38pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, while at the bakery section of my local supermarket, I heard the beat of what I assumed was a song playing. I really got into it, and bobbed my head and danced a little. After getting some strange looks, I realized the "beat" was a machine mixing frosting. FML

by Anonymous / 03/12/2011 at 10:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, a little boy called me on the phone, crying "grandma died" in a broken voice. I just didn't have the heart to say "wrong number." FML

by Waffle / 03/09/2011 at 10:47am / Kids

Today, my boyfriend called me and dumped me. Thirty minutes later he called asking for me back. When I asked why, he said "The other girl dumped me." FML

by life_isnt_fair / 03/09/2011 at 3:27am / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, I got a call from my daughter's school. Apparently, she was learning about the food pyramid and when she was asked to identify what she had eaten the day before, she said "dog food". FML

by Ldp56 / 02/25/2011 at 1:44pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. Everything was going perfectly, right up until he brought me back to his house to tell his family the good news. When I excused myself to the restroom, I overheard his mom say, "I thought you were going to break up with that stupid slut?" Welcome to the family. FML

by storyofmylife / 02/23/2011 at 4:52pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML

by no name / 02/22/2011 at 7:25am / Miscellaneous

Today, I desperately tried to explain to my boyfriend why he shouldn't talk about the bible during sex. He honestly doesn't understand. FML

by Clare / 02/21/2011 at 6:15pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend called me and asked me if I wanted to have phone sex with her. We got into it. It took us 13 minutes to figure out my mom had been on the other line the whole time. FML

by anonymous / 02/21/2011 at 12:01am / Intimacy

Today, I gave a safe sex speech to teens at my local high school. This was just ten minutes after my girlfriend had texted me, telling me she's pregnant. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2011 at 9:51am / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML

by PlayboyBunny / 02/19/2011 at 2:20am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I found my mom eating cat biscuits. We don't have a cat. FML

by Aled / 02/17/2011 at 11:33am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Animals