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hollylollyxoxo

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hollylollyxoxo
  • Town/Country : Texas
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 4 May 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 1365
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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hollylollyxoxo's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother got a pet ferret. He told me it had a flexible spine, so I bent it backwards. It farted, and clawed my face. FML

#16908147
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9596) - you deserved it (75397)

On 06/29/2011 at 10:55am - misc - by ashleyrae (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML

#16589228
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46324) - you deserved it (7240)

On 06/10/2011 at 1:01am - work - by MakeMeASandwich (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, after I successfully blew up a really large balloon, my mom said, in front of my older brother's friends, "Wow, you're going to make some man really happy one day!" FML

#16510202
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37607) - you deserved it (7868)

On 06/05/2011 at 2:48am - intimacy - by e_edge (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my neighbors' 9 year old son has been the one taking a shit on my doorstep everyday. Why? Because Cartman from South Park said that if you keep doing it, the person in the house will move. FML

#16166578
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35821) - you deserved it (4155)

On 05/14/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by IhateThem - United States

Today, I accidentally pocket dialed my sister while I was masturbating. FML

#15791690
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17530) - you deserved it (40987)

On 04/15/2011 at 1:34am - intimacy - by fmyhabit - United States (Utah)

Today, I came out to my parents. They nodded empathetically throughout my entire speech and told me repeatedly that it was okay. As I smiled and stood up, my dad asked, "But you're still going to marry a guy, right?" FML

#15767181
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36221) - you deserved it (7268)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got attacked by my own dog. I don't know what will be harder, telling everyone how my dog thought I was a robber or explaining to them why a 25 year old man owns a poodle. FML

#15766373
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21128) - you deserved it (14634)

On 04/13/2011 at 3:05am - animals - by Username -

Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML

#15762337
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16027) - you deserved it (34295)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, a stoned man tried to break into my house. Naked. FML

#15719480
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35521) - you deserved it (3973)

On 04/10/2011 at 2:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I discovered that not only is my live-in mother-in-law a fan of Lady Gaga, she dances around the house naked to fully embrace the music. FML

#15693901
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29596) - you deserved it (3403)

On 04/08/2011 at 12:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

#15619603
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70053) - you deserved it (5707)

On 04/03/2011 at 11:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I quit my job after I overheard my boss doing a 'hysterical' impression of me telling her about my dad's heart condition. FML

#15495668
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40749) - you deserved it (3157)

On 03/26/2011 at 8:05am - work - by dinomite -

Today, in front of my family, my brother's wife announced that she was pregnant with their first child. Everyone joked around and said I was next. Two weeks ago I found out that I'm sterile. FML

#15487602
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45078) - you deserved it (2730)

On 03/25/2011 at 8:07pm - health - by dazzla08 -

Today, at work, a coworker started to tell me about his weekend, without me even asking. Halfway through his story, I started to daydream and lost track of time. Bored, I told him, "Hey man, I'll call you back, I've got to get back to work." Then I remembered I wasn't on the phone. FML

#15441546
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9261) - you deserved it (31534)

On 03/22/2011 at 11:46pm - work - by PFCdavila (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I saw my dad's friend across the street working on my neighbor's roof. To continue the airsoft war we'd been having I shot at him with the sniper gun I bought. I hit him, and he fell off the roof. I ran over to see if he was ok. It wasn't my dad's friend. FML

#15431141
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12158) - you deserved it (45489)

On 03/22/2011 at 12:31pm - misc - by FailedSniper (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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Thursday 10 April 2014

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