Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

helen_ellexo

Offline (the 01/27/2016 at 7:04pm) | Search for a member

helen_ellexo

11Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4599
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About helen_ellexo : Wooo!

helen_ellexo's page activity

Visits<b>ItsNotThatBadBae</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 2:14am<b>dannnngthatsux</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 11:00pm<b>RandomJam124</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 4:01pm<b>SuperCasual</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 11:36pm<b>CaptainSmith28</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 5:57pm<b>ItsaBucsLife</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 8:16am<b>siham_maghrabia</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 5:10am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 8:59pm<b>katachristic</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 7:28pm<b>jjeffriesftw</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 5:45pm<b>DarkJediLove</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 4:24pm<b>Soninuva</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:56pm<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:39pm<b>MRP360</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:45pm<b>mrut92</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:19pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 11:45am<b>tj4234</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 10:51am<b>ladicius</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 10:15am

Fucked!<b>spockadelic</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 2:59am<b>jjeffriesftw</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 11:45pm<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 7:39pm<b>MRP360</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 6:45pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 3:54pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 3:49pm<b>khorstmye</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 3:40pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 12:08am<b>IVXX_</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 5:58am<b>tchopper1969</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 8:46pm<b>kingzxcreed</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 8:26am

helen_ellexo's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of helen_ellexo's badges

helen_ellexo's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that I am such a Grammar Nazi that when a porn star says something grammatically-incorrect, I lose my boner. FML

#20766909
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50266) - you deserved it (20173)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by BlueB (man) - United States

Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML

#20766880
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47958) - you deserved it (5148)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:14am - misc - by StockedWithJuice (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to my parents' barbecue. He knew my family is extremely religious, so what did he do? Called for silence to make an announcement, namely: "God isn't real." Cue a riot that ended in us being kicked out and me all but disowned for "putting him up to it". FML

#20765683
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46054) - you deserved it (7616)

On 07/05/2013 at 6:29pm - misc - by he's a dawk, and a cunt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while jogging, a guy tackled me and got my iPhone. Being a good runner, I caught up with him and grabbed him. Next thing I knew, I was on the ground with a policeman yelling in my ear. The guy got away. FML

#20764590
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55758) - you deserved it (3265)

On 07/05/2013 at 2:11am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML

#20763013
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63460) - you deserved it (11931)

On 07/04/2013 at 3:03am - intimacy - by Never Going Back To The Doctor (woman) - United States

Today, I had a job interview. All was going well until the interviewer asked me, "So, why should we hire you?" Without thinking, I blurted out, "Because, I'm awesome!" Don't think I'll be getting that one. FML

Today, I found out that my mom bet my dad $100 that she could pay my boyfriend ten bucks to break up with me. She is now $90 richer. FML

#20760905
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51827) - you deserved it (3545)

On 07/03/2013 at 12:26am - money - by Forever Alone (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw my older sister for the first time in three years. We hadn't spoke since I found out that she was the woman my college boyfriend left me for. Unfortunately, our reunion was fueled by her two-year-old son's desire to meet his dad. My husband. FML

#20760666
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69271) - you deserved it (5551)

On 07/02/2013 at 10:39pm - love - by Jenn (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to the doctor to have my annual check-up. After the doctor made me waddle across the room towards him, hop on one foot for thirty seconds, and then lay on my stomach and do the worm, he finally said, "OK, that wasn't really part of the check-up. You're large on the hips. Lay off the Cheetos." FML

#20760331
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46628) - you deserved it (12345)

On 07/02/2013 at 7:16pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML

#20759724
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45561) - you deserved it (4639)

On 07/02/2013 at 12:17pm - misc - by dry spell (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I tried acid for the first time while camping with my best friend. A drunk driver smashed into my car, leaving it totaled. I had to explain the situation to a cop all while thinking my car was bleeding green ooze. FML

#20759193
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26292) - you deserved it (66970)

On 07/02/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

#20759121
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54920) - you deserved it (13064)

On 07/02/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by yeshehaspornaddiction (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my fiancé paid a visit to my parents so he could ask my dad's permission to marry me. My dad responded with, "Why buy the cow when you can milk it for free?" FML

#20757403
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54833) - you deserved it (4621)

On 07/01/2013 at 2:38am - love - by Gracie-Ann (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to get new shoes. I'm a pretty tall girl and I have proportional feet. I asked the cute guy who worked there for a size 9.5. He burst into laughter before putting on a shocked face and saying, "Oh wait... You're serious." Goodbye, self esteem. FML

#20757181
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45764) - you deserved it (3028)

On 07/01/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by theyre not THAT big. (woman) - United States (Alabama)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: