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helen_ellexo

Offline (the 08/28/2015 at 2:55am) | Search for a member

helen_ellexo

11Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3899
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About helen_ellexo : Wooo!

helen_ellexo's page activity

Visits<b>CaptainSmith28</b> - 10 hours ago<b>ItsaBucsLife</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 8:16am<b>siham_maghrabia</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 5:10am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 8:59pm<b>katachristic</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 7:28pm<b>jjeffriesftw</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 5:45pm<b>DarkJediLove</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 4:24pm<b>Soninuva</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:56pm<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:39pm<b>MRP360</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:45pm<b>mrut92</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:19pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 11:45am<b>tj4234</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 10:51am<b>ladicius</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 10:15am<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 10:01am<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 9:54am<b>Jiratias</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 9:48am<b>khorstmye</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 9:40am

Fucked!<b>spockadelic</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 2:59am<b>jjeffriesftw</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 11:45pm<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 7:39pm<b>MRP360</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 6:45pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 3:54pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 3:49pm<b>khorstmye</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 3:40pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 12:08am<b>IVXX_</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 5:58am<b>tchopper1969</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 8:46pm<b>kingzxcreed</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 8:26am

helen_ellexo's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of helen_ellexo's badges

helen_ellexo's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML

#20637584
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73987) - you deserved it (8248)

On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34725) - you deserved it (119493)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, I was again turned down by a potential host family on a student exchange site. Their reasoning was basically that since I'm American, I might do something to endanger my health, get hurt, and then sue them over my own stupidity. FML

#20602754
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43035) - you deserved it (12557)

On 04/18/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by thanks, my fellow americans - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I picked up my new car. The dealer offered to connect my iPhone to the Bluetooth system for me. Once connected it automatically started playing the audiobook I had been listening to over the stereo system. Right on a passage which had an extremely graphic description of anal sex. FML

Today, my fiancé is returning home, so I decided to wax myself, thinking things would get intimate. I warmed the wax strips and set them on the counter. Our cat jumped onto the counter and managed to roll onto one of the strips. Suffice to say, the wrong pussy got a painful waxing. FML

#20521590
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45378) - you deserved it (7354)

On 02/25/2013 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I realized that without my birth control pills, I would have no idea what day it is. FML

#20507998
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23216) - you deserved it (15086)

On 02/15/2013 at 8:57am - health - by PurpleSloth (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I told my parents that what I'd really like for my 21st birthday is the 1865 edition of the Memoirs of Saint-Simon in 22 volumes that I found online for $200, and have been wanting for months. They laughed and said, "Yeah, right. We'll get you an iPhone and perhaps you'll become normal." FML

#20488681
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35558) - you deserved it (9316)

On 02/01/2013 at 4:19am - misc - by HistoryFreak (woman) - France

Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML

#20462590
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41917) - you deserved it (3526)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:26pm - health - by SF49 - United States

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50605) - you deserved it (4849)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, I went to church for the first time in my life. They had a Jesus statue at the altar, and I noticed he was surprisingly muscular. Ten minutes later, I had to excuse myself, after I caught myself fantasizing over a crucified Jesus. FML

#20432015
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11450) - you deserved it (37027)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by Weirdo (woman) - United States

Today, I had to slowly explain to my mother that Americans are not the only people who celebrate Christmas. FML

#20419656
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29968) - you deserved it (2606)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I dyed my naturally-blonde hair dark brown. Upon seeing me, my boyfriend immediately wanted to have sex, because I now remind him of his favourite porn star. FML

#20413704
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44246) - you deserved it (14524)

On 12/22/2012 at 12:56pm - intimacy - by brunetteshavemorefun (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I came home to find my husband and our 4-year-old son simultaneously peeing off the second-floor balcony. My husband was giggling like a little girl. FML

#20403594
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33440) - you deserved it (6029)

On 12/17/2012 at 11:21am - kids - by Bonding_boys (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while at school, a bra fell out of my coat. After the initial shock, people started congratulating me on finally getting a girlfriend. I didn't have the heart to tell them it was my mom's. FML

#20175088
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25180) - you deserved it (3446)

On 11/23/2012 at 10:56am - misc - by Tymer (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while working as a massage therapist, a client had me work on a very specific knot in his shoulder. He also happened to have a very detailed, very realistic tattoo of the crucifixion on his shoulder. I just spent 45 minutes violating Jesus. FML

#20173351
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21091) - you deserved it (3722)

On 11/22/2012 at 1:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States



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