emoaileen

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emoaileen

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 28 April 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1754
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About emoaileen : SWS / FIR / TC / WTK / SOM

emoaileen's page activity

Visits<b>virgilcole505</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 3:54am<b>dianafuentes</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 5:46pm<b>waffule365</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 3:04am<b>darkgodxvx</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 9:35am<b>flupsht</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 8:43pm<b>PantyGAMES</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 5:10am<b>acerima</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 11:22am<b>crackmore278</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 1:34pm<b>hoffmanam</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 8:51am<b>theawkwardlife</b> - the 02/12/2013 at 7:23pm<b>LeCielNousAide</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 4:41pm<b>Kidkaplan</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 10:13pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 08/17/2011 at 11:53pm

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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emoaileen's favorite FMLs

Today, I started the job of my dreams. Our first marketing meeting was an in-depth analysis of the phrase, "Haters gonna hate, potatoes gonna potate". I have a 5 year contract. FML

by picklet / 05/12/2012 at 10:36am / Malaysia (Negeri Sembilan) / Work

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he would still love me if I became a vegetable. His response: "Well, the sex wouldn't be any different." FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 7:35am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had my headphones on while on the bus. I didn't realize how loud the music was till the woman sitting next to me punched me for changing her favorite song and then "ignoring her" when she asked me to put it back. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2012 at 12:41am / United States / Transportation

Today, while I was at work in a machine shop, I cut myself really bad. Not by any sharp tools, drills, or metals I work with. Just the soap dispenser. FML

by Bullocks / 04/27/2012 at 1:49am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML

by lindsaykay / 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

by SeeingLlamas / 04/17/2012 at 5:38am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML

by girly / 04/12/2012 at 12:06am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, while running in the park, I noticed some ducks in a pond. I stopped to look at them and began quacking at them, to see if they would react. This would have been OK had I not been wearing ear-buds, blasting music, making me unable to realize just how loud I was quacking. With people all around. FML

by Quackers / 04/11/2012 at 11:39am / United States (Colorado) / Animals

Today, my wife sent me to the store to pick stuff up so we could make BLTs. I got the bacon, but couldn't remember what else went into them, so I bought an avocado and napkins. When I got back home, my wife very slowly and sarcastically explained what BLT stands for. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2012 at 3:40pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cleaning the windows at work and a guy walked in so I opened the door for him. After I opened the door, he stood there with his eyes closed and his arms open. I thought he wanted a hug so I hugged him. Apparently he wanted me to spray him with Windex. FML

by Kait / 04/05/2012 at 12:13am / United States / Work

Today, I joined a dating site. The first guy it recommended is the stalker I met on the last dating site I used. FML

by thammer / 03/27/2012 at 8:25am / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I found out that sex in the woods is amazing. I also found that the roar of a nearby bear will end the amazement. Not only was I cock blocked by a bear, I almost shit myself. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2012 at 11:21pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I was on the train ride home from a trip to Florida, and I gave my mom a call. While we talked, I made an offhand comment that all my friends back home must miss me. She knowingly asked if I meant my Sims and my cat. FML

by lyla / 03/20/2012 at 3:15pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

by yamsterr / 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm / United States / Love