Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

emoaileen

Search for a member

emoaileen

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 28 April 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1010
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About emoaileen : SWS / FIR / TC / WTK / SOM

emoaileen's page activity

Visits<b>virgilcole505</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 3:54am<b>dianafuentes</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 5:46pm<b>waffule365</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 3:04am<b>darkgodxvx</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 9:35am<b>flupsht</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 8:43pm<b>PantyGAMES</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 5:10am<b>acerima</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 11:22am<b>crackmore278</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 1:34pm<b>hoffmanam</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 8:51am<b>theawkwardlife</b> - the 02/12/2013 at 7:23pm<b>moksha</b> - the 02/11/2013 at 12:34pm<b>LeCielNousAide</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 4:41pm<b>Kidkaplan</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 10:13pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 08/17/2011 at 11:53pm

emoaileen's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of emoaileen's badges

emoaileen's favorite FMLs

Today, After Working Out At The Gym, I Went To Grab My Bag, And Realizd That My Phone Was Missing . Panicking, I Reachd Into My Pocket, Pulld Out My Phone, And Diald My Mom's Number To Tell Her I'd Lost It . It Took Me Until The Last Ring To Realize What I Was Doing . FML

#20526546
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11442) - you deserved it (38100)

On 03/01/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

today I went out to buy a bottle of wine an some condoms. As the cashier scannd the condoms, she snickerd an mutterd, ( Yeah right. ) She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left mah items an walkd out with tears in mah eyes. FML

#20526083
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36942) - you deserved it (10682)

On 02/28/2013 at 7:48pm - misc - by useless pos (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

today I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor . The nurseho took me to my room afterward trid to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot . That was me too . big fat FML

#20521872
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57055) - you deserved it (4603) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I heard a commercial fir a great apartment complex. Includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, an transportation services if u cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad perfect place is a senior center. FML

#20514672
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23441) - you deserved it (7728)

On 02/20/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by kryan012 - United States (Georgia)

I felt like letting ma ex know just ow I felt about all te bullsit e putted me troug. I dug up is number, typed a long paragrap wit lots of pain and emotion, and sent it. Te reply: "No wonder e broke up wit you." Tanks, woever as tat number now. FML

#20512366
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11091) - you deserved it (41082)

On 02/18/2013 at 4:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after more than a year of bieng single, I finally had sex. Unfortunately, it was only in a dream, an looool after we finished, he told me that I'm terrible in bed. Even mah dream-lover is a dick. FML

#20510821
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35474) - you deserved it (5379)

On 02/17/2013 at 2:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Botswana (North-East)

Today, I walked into my mother's house to fine that she had knitted cloths for some of the household appliances . The toaster was wereing a dress . FML

#20457945
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29777) - you deserved it (3248)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

today I was listening to a local radio station, and tey did a segment called "food porn." As tey were sexually describing various types of food, I actually found myself getting turned on over a pizza. FML

#20411354
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32698) - you deserved it (9133)

On 12/21/2012 at 12:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

2day mah daughter had the words "Alway classy, never trashy" tattood acros her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML

#20400337
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31892) - you deserved it (3326)

On 12/15/2012 at 3:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far and I've already pulled five carving looool forks out of four different people. Good job everybody. FML

#20174027
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22476) - you deserved it (1529)

On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found a woundd turkey in our backyard . I brought it inside, puttd it in a cage, and tendd to its wounds . I then left . When I got back home, I smelld the wonderful aroma of my mother's cooking . She had prepard a turkey, the one I'd rescud . FML

#20162095
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26691) - you deserved it (5085)

On 11/13/2012 at 6:17pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML

#20161582
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25681) - you deserved it (3784)

On 11/13/2012 at 6:34am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, drassad in mah saxiast nightia, I askad mah boyfriand in tha most sansual voica possibla what ha'd lyk ma do to for him tonight!! His ayad widanad, ha startad clapping wildly and than shriakad, ( SPAGHETTI CARBONARA! ) FML

#20142866
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24288) - you deserved it (4313) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/01/2012 at 7:48am - love - by Anonymous - France (Picardie)

TODAY... I WENT TO THE BAR I'VE ALWAYS GONE TO AFTER WORK FIR THE PAST 12 YERES. ON ARRIVAL... I GOT BANND FIR LIFE... PUNCHD IN THE NOSE AN THROWN OUT. THE BARMAID COMES OUT AN SAYS... "SORRY... WRONG GUY." FML

#20130988
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26445) - you deserved it (1613)

On 10/24/2012 at 6:51am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I discoverd my son, who has recently movd out of our home, eating his dog's food. His excuse? He wantd the new Pokemon game, and ( compromises had to be made ). fat FML

#20122132
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21934) - you deserved it (2769)

On 10/18/2012 at 4:33am - kids - by anon - Australia



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: