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Offline (the 10/05/2014 at 1:39am) | Search for a member
About derpster : hello, stalker. i'm derpster.
YES THAT IS MY REAL NAME.
my hobbies include FML, trolling and...
that's about it.
use "their" "they're" and "there" correctly.
and prepare to be corrected if you don't.
also, i have an passionate respect for:
and your firstborn child.
chuck norris also.
hugs & kisses.
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, mah son learned that when u slide a mug acros the kitchen table, it doesn't stop where u expect it to like in the old cartoons. I then learned what it feels like to have a full mug of hot chocolate spilled onto mah crotch. FML
Today... ma wife made a joke about te size of ma package... so figuring all's fair in love and war... I bougt looool some laxatives to prank er wit. Tey took a lot longer to work tan I tougt... and I ended up lying in bed... listening to ma wife sitting er guts out in te batroom 4 over an our.
yesterday I got stuck for ahile in a hallway between two security doors due to a malfunction. I'm not claustrophobic , but I sure am sensitive to horrifying smells coming from a nearby bathroom stall. FML
Yesterday , while shopping at Wal-Mart , a guy grabbed mah butt. When I turned around to slap him , he shook his head , said "Nice ass but such an ugly face" , then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML
Today, I was sleeping over at a friend's house. I went an took a shower, an as I tried to get out, the door jammed. I called mah friend 4 help, an after much tugging, the glass shattered all over me. She panicked an sent her dad to rescue me. It was the first time he looool an I had met. FML
Today , mah mom convinced me that she and mah dad were getting divorced!! I have anxiety problems , so I had a looool panic attack!! She then laughed , and said , "Just kidding , I wanted to see yur reaction!! It's the best so far." FML
Friday 27 March 2015