cookiesFTW

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cookiesFTW

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9397
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About cookiesFTW : Hello everyone!! I like to come on this site to read Fmls when I'm bored. I have good sense of humor, I'm really friendly and love cats. I do have hearing aids but that doesn't make me any different than anyone else.

Feel free to message me if you want to talk.

cookiesFTW's page activity

Visits<b>samanthajulie</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 9:33pm<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 6:46pm<b>2simz</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 3:28am<b>redheadedbabe420</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 12:12am<b>Rskittles10</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 3:44am<b>NessieMonster188</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 2:54am<b>emmnguyenn</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 11:09am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 3:54pm<b>frecklesrose93</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 11:21pm<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 1:04pm<b>Izzyduck07</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 1:30pm<b>kaiboi702</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 6:57pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 12:35am<b>qdawg06</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 1:55pm<b>Horsempeg</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 9:45pm<b>veebz256</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 11:14pm<b>clair1357</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 10:58pm<b>amandathecreator</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 9:05pm

Fucked!<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 12:46am<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 7:04pm<b>nerovetsrethca</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 12:05am<b>amandathecreator</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 4:11pm

cookiesFTW's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of cookiesFTW's badges

cookiesFTW's favorite FMLs

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

by Anonymous / 02/12/2010 at 2:51am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad and I had an argument. Then we went outside to shovel the snow out of the driveway. I heard him yelling and figured he was just yelling at me some more, so I turned my iPod up so I couldn't hear him anymore. Turns out he had fallen, cracked a rib, and needed help up. FML

by skinsfan7592 / 02/08/2010 at 10:19am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad and I had an argument. Then we went outside to shovel the snow out of the driveway. I heard him yelling and figured he was just yelling at me some more, so I turned my iPod up so I couldn't hear him anymore. Turns out he had fallen, cracked a rib, and needed help up. FML

by skinsfan7592 / 02/08/2010 at 10:19am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of one week is suicidal and crazy about me. She showed me that she carved her old boyfriends name in her arm and she threatened suicide if I ever left her. FML

by mike / 02/07/2010 at 2:16am / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, things heated up with the new guy I've been seeing for a couple of weeks, he kept saying things like "I want you so bad" and "it's going to take hours" to the point that I was so hot, I decided to go for it. Apparently he has "a problem sometimes" getting it up. FML

by unsatisfied / 01/31/2010 at 7:20pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking to school. When I was about halfway there, someone put a gun to the back of my head and told me to give him all my money. As I slowly turned around, I saw it was my dad putting a banana to my head. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2010 at 8:16am / United States (California) / Money

Today, I was caught going on Facebook at work. I was called into my boss' office to be reprimanded, and while he was lecturing me on the importance of staying focussed and the misuse of company property, his computer beeped. It was his Facebook chat notifying him of a new message. FML

by boredatwork / 01/29/2010 at 10:33am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was bet 100 dollars that I couldn't break a piece off a brick with my head. I couldn't, and I have 2 gashes in my head now. FML

by anonymous / 01/21/2010 at 12:02am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to sneak into the shower at her house while her parents went out to eat and a movie. Half way through our shower we heard a knocking at the door, it was her mom. We had left all of our clothes downstairs. Safe to say I won't be allowed there any more. FML

by IceMage / 01/17/2010 at 7:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, I was doing a shit load of sit-ups on my mattress. After realizing the bed was squeaking, I heard my dad laughing very hard from the basement. He thought I was masturbating. FML

by nooneatall / 01/14/2010 at 10:16pm / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend dumped me so he could sleep with my mom without feeling guilty. FML

by notasgood / 01/12/2010 at 6:54pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML

by pottypattypeepants / 12/31/2009 at 3:04pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I told my mom I was going on a date tonight. She laughed and didn't believe me. When I tried to convince her it was real, she got mad and grounded me for lying. I had to cancel the date. FML

by Grounded / 12/29/2009 at 1:50pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I walked in on my mom and dad. It wasn't my dad. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2009 at 7:49am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my grandpa died. As I rushed home crying to comfort my parents, I got pulled over for speeding. The officer told me to cut out the "fake" tears". When I told him my grandpa just died he tacked on another $100 for lying to an officer. Worst. Christmas. Ever. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2009 at 7:18pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation