About Cookiesftw
Hello everyone!! I like to come on this site to read Fmls when I'm bored. I have good sense of humor, I'm really friendly and love cats. I do have hearing aids but that doesn't make me any different than anyone else. Feel free to message me if you want to talk.
Cookiesftw - Followers
Cookiesftw - Followed
Cookiesftw's FML badges
  • Beginner

    You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
  • Socialite

    You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
  • Checking you out

    You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
  • Happy ending

    Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
  • This isn't what should be happening

    You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.
  • Inception

    You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return, you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
  • I like your style

    You gave a Hug to someone. How cute!
  • I moderated this!

    In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
  • Profile completed

    You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • The Mixer

    You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    1%
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    54%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    10%
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
    23%
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
    2%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
    9%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    3%
  • 50 quality comments

    Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
    2%
The list of badges to find
Cookiesftw's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving home from school, when I saw this girl I like walking home. Trying to be polite, I pulled over and asked if she wanted a ride. After my offer, I was rejected as she said "No, I'm actually already home," and walked up the nearest driveway... MY driveway. FML

By Kelavmeister - / Friday 17 April 2009 01:16 / United States

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

By a critically injured shitehawk - / Saturday 25 April 2015 10:34 / United Kingdom - York

Today, my brother in law brought a dead rabbit to my nephew saying, "I found the Easter Bunny!" My nephew started crying hours ago and hasn't stopped. FML

By :O / Sunday 5 April 2015 22:19 / Canada - Winnipeg

Today, in a crowded doctor's waiting room, my two-year-old daughter let a loud fart rip. I asked her, "What do we say?" She replied, "IT'S ME!" FML

By bleue / Thursday 23 April 2015 12:27 / France - Montberon

Today, I managed to get my 4-year-old son to agree that, "cigarettes are poop." I was a lot less proud of myself when he pointed at a 6-foot bodybuilder-type dude in the subway and yelled, "That man smells of pooooooop." FML

By Insanity / Thursday 9 April 2015 05:28 / France - La Poste