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chood22

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chood22

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  • Number of visits : 470
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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chood22's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to blow-dry the sweat off her armpits instead of showering. FML

#19454762
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18759) - you deserved it (1950)

On 04/12/2012 at 8:51am - misc - by crazydaughter - Egypt

Today, as I was walking home from work, I became the victim of a drive-by peanutting. Yes, apparently I'm only worth a bag of nuts. FML

#19341181
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17207) - you deserved it (2133)

On 03/24/2012 at 9:41pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got threatened with a gun through the drive thru speaker because I didn't offer some guy any pies to go with his meal. FML

#19291503
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20701) - you deserved it (2530)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:37am - work - by CDeVeney92 - United States (Texas)

Today, I got my braces put on. This is the second time I've had them. The first time was after my cousin opened a car door in my face. This time a jock punched me in the mouth for saying that Reese's taste the same as Snickers peanut butter. FML

#19277494
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20052) - you deserved it (4318)

On 03/14/2012 at 4:12pm - health - by braceface - United States

Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML

#19277345
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9197) - you deserved it (28909)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:11pm - misc - by zztopspinner (man) - United States

Today, I woke up sweating and gasping for air after having a terrible nightmare. The nightmare involved my deceased mother-in-law bitching me out for being a bad influence on her daughter and threatening to cut my nuts off. Even in death, she won't leave me be. FML

#19270798
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23238) - you deserved it (2026)

On 03/13/2012 at 12:13pm - misc - by lanu (man) - United States

Today, I was talking to a group of friends about the various problems in Africa. One of them interrupts me and asks with a straight face, "If it's so bad over there, why don't they all just leave?" FML

#19264925
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20478) - you deserved it (3425)

On 03/12/2012 at 3:48pm - misc - by dumbfriend - United States

Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML

#19263580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33079) - you deserved it (5267)

On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML

#19263580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33079) - you deserved it (5267)

On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I called my wife from work to check in on her because she's eight months pregnant. She didn't answer. Instead she showed up at my work hysterically crying and screaming, "You don't love me because I'm a fat whale!" She then knocked everything off my desk. FML

#19255616
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26353) - you deserved it (2559)

On 03/11/2012 at 3:36am - love - by Tristan Brantley - United States (California)

Today, in the locker room at work, someone tried writing "douche bag" on my locker, and misspelled it four times before apparently giving up. FML

#19255450
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20980) - you deserved it (1790)

On 03/11/2012 at 1:39am - work - by The Last One (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was re-watching my wedding video. As I was walking down the aisle, you could hear my grandfather mutter "Here comes the bride, all fat and wide." FML

#19250410
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32846) - you deserved it (4948)

On 03/10/2012 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year-old brat. He refused to eat his vegetables, so I forbade him from playing until they were finished. He stomped off upstairs, so I let him cool off for a couple of minutes. When I went upstairs, he had taken scissors to all of his mother's clothes. FML

#19201046
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21657) - you deserved it (2727)

On 03/02/2012 at 3:30am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium

Today, I told a customer that we don't do refunds. He responded by throwing his wallet at my face and accusing me of stealing it. FML

#19187266
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23284) - you deserved it (1991)

On 02/29/2012 at 2:47am - work - by wallets - United States

Today, my grandma seemingly decided that it was a really nice day to put my cat in the dryer. FML

#19180967
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27455) - you deserved it (2145)

On 02/28/2012 at 7:46am - animals - by JeffeeBojangles - United States (Texas)



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