chewychips

Search for a member

Offline (yesterday at 5:43am)

chewychips

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2858
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

chewychips's page activity

Visits<b>Tripartita</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 3:57am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 3:37am<b>Welshite</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 7:28am<b>CharlizeWasHere</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 1:46pm<b>supernaturalcat</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 6:37pm<b>ajhill722</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 5:26am

chewychips's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of chewychips's badges

chewychips's favorite FMLs

Today, I overheard a coworker talking about going to what sounded like a dentist's appointment. As she left later, I jokingly said "Remember to open wide!" Turned out her appointment was with her OB/GYN, not a dentist. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2016 at 11:44am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I checked my Tumblr account to see if anyone had commented on the photos of my new tattoo. There were only 3 posts, and 2 of them were people linking it to "Awful Tattoo" blogs. FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2016 at 2:00am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was washing my hands in a public bathroom when a lady came in, looked at me in the mirror and then opened the door again to check if she was in the right bathroom. FML

by itsnotalright / 03/17/2016 at 12:25am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend and I were reminiscing and sharing funny stories of when we were little. It was then that he told me he used to be flexible enough to suck his own weiner. FML

by Anon / 03/15/2016 at 2:52am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was using the urinal at work when an old guy started using the one next to mine. All of a sudden, he used that Ghostbusters' line, "Cross the streams!", and tried to pee into my urinal. I had to wait 4 hours in pee-drenched shoes until my shift was over. FML

by NotASquirrel / 03/12/2016 at 12:29am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my ex stole my car keys. Good news is she can't drive stick. Bad news is she set my car on fire. FML

by GrandTheftArson / 03/08/2016 at 10:51pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, my co-worker and I got into an argument. It ended with him threatening me to roll my balls with a paint roller until they looked like "fresh, popping doughs". FML

by ReComatosed242 / 03/08/2016 at 7:29pm / Bahamas / Work

Today, as I was doing my make-up, I needed a Q-tip to fix a mistake. I took one out the box and put it in my mouth to get it wet. Too bad someone had used it before to clean their ears. FML

by idontlikebitter / 03/08/2016 at 4:10pm / Switzerland (Aargau) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend woke up, and half-asleep, muttered: "What time is it? Did the neighbours start drilling again?" I'll try harder to keep my farts in from now on. FML

by Juju Bear / 03/08/2016 at 6:54am / Miscellaneous

Today, I rubbed chilli powder on my fingers in an attempt to kick the habit of biting my nails. Ten minutes later I went to the bathroom. It still burns. FML

by b5b0n36 / 03/05/2016 at 9:38pm / United States (California) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, at work, man who was buying medicine for his son came up to me for help. He didn't know how to explain it to me, so instead he showed me a picture of a rash on his kid's butthole. FML

by Anonymous / 03/02/2016 at 12:06am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I walked my girlfriend home. As I kissed her goodbye, I heard a high-pitched scream and turned just in time to see her little brother charge head-first into my nuts. All because I kissed her on the cheek. FML

by Racked / 03/01/2016 at 1:00pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I was mugged while changing my tampon. The mugger took everything, including the fresh tampon. FML

by BroadcitySF / 02/27/2016 at 10:42pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad uttered the words, "You gotta admit, your mother's got one hell of an ass." FML

by blaaargh / 02/27/2016 at 3:54am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Son, I want you to suck upon my nipples of knowledge." FML

by leahrb / 02/24/2016 at 1:55pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous