Alright alright alright.
Yup, you read that right... We're talking about bobbing for apples, playing the skin flute, getting your knees dirty, and slurping the gherkin. Everything about giving head makes them worthy of the FML Select. I mean, balls. 'Nuff said.
But if the prospect of having man's hanging fruit oh so close to your face wasn't enough to make you second guess doing the deed, take it from these users: blowy-j's aren't always a walk in the park. And I mean for everyone involved. Sticking the most sensitive part of your body into an orifice lined with teeth that are there for the express purpose of biting things off...
Just think about that as you scroll through these FMLs.
Watch out! Blowies can be dangerous. Be sure to exercise caution when doing the deed.
Today, as I was crossing a street, a car hit me and broke two of my ribs. The driver was too busy paying attention to his girlfriend who was giving him a blowjob from the passenger seat. I could see the look of ecstasy on his face as he rammed into me and drove off without noticing. FML
Need a tip (heh)? Ask grandma, she's been around the block a few times.
Today, my grandma gave me a sex talk. Not the usual one, either. This one was about blowjobs. I had to sit politely as she explained it's something all women have to learn if they want a well-behaved husband, but that it's an "acquired taste". Gag me. FML
You see, it's all about give and take. First, let's take a look at the giving side.
Today, my boyfriend keeps requesting that I make eye contact when I give him blowjobs. He won't let up about it. I don't know how to break it to him that his penis is too small for me to suck and look upward at the same time. FML
The truth is, it's not always a field of roses to be on the receiving end either.
Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML
Okay, so I lied. It was really just that last gif that was gross. But, come on, you've gotta admit it's pretty gnarly.