carmel1110

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carmel1110

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4227
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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carmel1110's page activity

Visits<b>Tomato_Cheese</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 1:37am<b>Siehnados</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 1:32pm<b>XxMuFaSaxX</b> - the 06/29/2016 at 11:02pm<b>EwahWeeWah</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 12:40pm<b>immaloser95</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 4:05pm<b>SWEET_CS</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 3:18pm<b>Crazion</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 4:16pm<b>Scrambled</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 12:24pm<b>M3DO</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 1:00am<b>Unused_Account13</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 11:15pm<b>rnayyyyy</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 3:46am<b>NoBothersForMe</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 2:03pm<b>krazy789</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 5:24pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 9:53am<b>TheSquire</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 11:11pm<b>RWBYRose</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 11:37pm<b>abattior</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 12:36am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 8:27am

Fucked!<b>xFade26</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 6:47am

carmel1110's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of carmel1110's badges

carmel1110's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my son told my daughter at some point that "real" name for Hershey's Kisses is "blowjobs." I found this out because at kindergarten she was asked what her favorite food was. The teacher wasn't happy when she called me. FML

by Grant / 01/10/2013 at 7:51pm / United States / Kids

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

by kk / 01/09/2013 at 11:07am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

by shattysituation / 12/31/2012 at 5:36pm / United States / Work

Today, my car was broken into. What was stolen? My daughter's $11 One Direction poster. What will it cost to fix my car? $1,000. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2012 at 11:58pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money

Today, after having sex for the first time with my girlfriend, I realised I was in love with her. I noticed she had an eyelash on her breast. After tugging it a few times I realised it was actually a single black nipple hair. She was so embarrassed, she kicked me out and now won't return my calls. FML

by ohman / 12/27/2012 at 10:06pm / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy

Today, I got a phone call from my boyfriend breaking things off with me. He waited until the day after Christmas because he wanted all his presents. And he got me nothing. FML

by Jolene / 12/26/2012 at 9:32am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand. Bookmarked. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2012 at 1:07am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

by Saradee / 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I received a package from a local guy on Craigslist. Instead of the iPhone I paid $350 for, the box only contained a photo of an iPhone. The guy had been dumb enough to attach a return address, so my husband went over and beat the shit out of him. I now have to bail him out of jail. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2012 at 12:52pm / United States (Maryland) / Money

Today, the highly intoxicated singer of my band decided it would be a wonderful idea to squat down and take a shit on stage in the middle of a gig. FML

by dudeyouarefired / 12/20/2012 at 3:16am / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me his Christmas gift to me was custom made. I told my parents in excitement, thinking it could possibly be a ring. Half an hour later he told me what it was; a molded dildo of his penis. It's going to be an awkward conversation with my parents when they ask what I got. FML

by djl / 12/20/2012 at 12:30am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I had been trying to text my girlfriend all day, but no reply. After a while, I became worried so I called. She picked up and said, "Can't talk, busy." Not even a minute later, my best friend says to me, "Dude, tell your girlfriend to leave me alone. She's been texting me all day." FML

by SugarMyBalls / 12/19/2012 at 6:31pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, the girl I dumped three years ago because she wouldn't take my band seriously is now a successful and rich environmental scientist. Meanwhile, I'm still unemployed, living with my parents, and can barely remember how to play a guitar. FML

by rightinthekarma / 12/19/2012 at 10:26am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, after several years spent hung up on my ex, I was finally moving on. I was on a date with my new boyfriend when my ex walked past us. He broke down crying, got on his knees, and begged me to come back. FML

by Miki / 12/16/2012 at 6:57pm / United States (Louisiana) / Love

Today, my "friends" set me up on a blind date with a guy who according to their description, sounded perfect in just about every way. He turned out to be my obsessive ex, and this is their idea of a funny prank. FML

by lovelychris / 12/16/2012 at 2:15pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Love