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carmel1110's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
carmel1110's favorite FMLs
Today, I woke up after a night out at the bar, immediately remembering that I had lost my cell phone, my ID and somehow spent $100. Feeling like shit already, my friend then goes on to tell me that I flashed the entire bar, and ran around the hotel naked. FML
by drunkennight / 11/22/2009 at 10:45pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous
by Volume_control / 11/10/2009 at 9:41am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/04/2009 at 4:42pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up extremely hungover next to a guy I have been in love with for a while but hadn't seen for ages. Turns out he had a bet going with his mates. He bet he could get me to sleep with him straight away even after not calling me for a month. He was right. FML
by Lovestupid / 11/03/2009 at 4:25am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Intimacy
Today, it was my wedding day. I gave a speech about the first time my wife and I met. I said I knew she was the perfect woman for me and it was love at first sight. I looked to my right as she stormed off and then realized I had told a story about my ex-girlfriend who was sitting in the crowd. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2009 at 5:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, my boyfriend gave me a fancy chocolate candy and I got angry at him for forgetting that I'm allergic to chocolate and threw the candy into the garbage disposal. Turns out, he had spent a ton of money getting a chocolatier to put an engagement ring inside the candy that I just destroyed. FML
by jaxattax / 10/20/2009 at 4:17pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in a bad mood after being stuck in traffic for 2 hours and late for work. I was walking to my building when I saw a 100 dollar note flying my way. A man called after me for it, but being selfish I took the note in my pocket as a little reward. That man was my boss. Yes, I'm fired. FML
by horniness / 10/10/2009 at 12:30pm / Hong Kong / Money
by namhtor / 09/28/2009 at 3:20pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy
Today, I removed the safety padding from around the trampoline because it seemed useless. This afternoon, I did a backflip, got my hair stuck in the springs, ripped out a chunk of my hair, and face planted it into the brick pavers. FML
by Not-so-good-gymnast / 09/27/2009 at 4:35am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking through my house when I saw a strange man sitting on my couch. I asked him who he was and he said he was a friend of my mom's. He told me to join him and when I sat down, he punched me in the face and stole my cell phone, wallet, and car keys. FML
by robbed / 09/03/2009 at 3:09pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, as a joke, my friends and I decided to put me in a dress and makeup, to creep out a friend. I'm a guy. I'm not sure which is worse, the fact that I so willingly volunteered to wear the dress and the makeup, or the fact that I thought it was comfy and made me look slim. FML
by twitch01 / 08/09/2009 at 3:31am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/05/2009 at 1:15am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Tuck_My_Life / 08/03/2009 at 1:15am / United States (New Hampshire) / Love
Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML
by dumbo / 07/30/2009 at 10:43am / United States (Virginia) / Animals
by webperson04 / 07/27/2009 at 3:07pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I asked a customer to send me via e-mail the image he wanted me to print. He said, "I don't…