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blackwidowtaco

Offline (the 09/18/2015 at 7:21am) | Search for a member

blackwidowtaco

3Fucked!

blackwidowtaco
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 May 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5579
  • Number of comments : 477
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About blackwidowtaco : Shit happens.

blackwidowtaco's page activity

Visits<b>dno79</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 4:58am<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 1:29pm<b>Dalboz</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 12:30pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 4:00pm<b>GoldFishPony</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 1:28am<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 12:57am<b>rogwest</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 1:30pm<b>i_lik_tomaters</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 1:25am<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 1:26am<b>Ebola</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 11:00pm<b>Zatert</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 3:30pm<b>balboa_2</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 2:39pm<b>ADBurns</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 2:08pm<b>C7</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 11:42am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 9:19am<b>MikeonFML</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 9:05am<b>AlexanderDavidd</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 8:58am<b>saocrates</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 6:13am

Fucked!<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 2:28am<b>XxDanno316xX</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 4:23pm

blackwidowtaco's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of blackwidowtaco's badges

blackwidowtaco's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed in Charlie Brown's ghost costume, a white sheet with holes all over. I got beat up for dressing like a member of the KKK. FML

#21289401
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35867) - you deserved it (7145)

On 10/31/2014 at 11:59pm - misc - by Halloween Fail (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was being interviewed for a grant over the phone. When asked why I wanted to go to school to be an OB nursing assistant, I panicked and yelled, "BECAUSE VAGINAS ARE FASCINATING!" into the receiver. FML

#21286497
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30270) - you deserved it (13044)

On 10/27/2014 at 7:05pm - health - by lady parts - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job, mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

#21283795
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38441) - you deserved it (4688)

On 10/23/2014 at 2:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad told me someday I'll find a man who wants a nice lumberjack for a wife. FML

#21279635
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34457) - you deserved it (3546)

On 10/17/2014 at 4:14am - love - by axewoman -

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34402) - you deserved it (16112)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

#21213104
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50427) - you deserved it (7172)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was feeling unappreciated and asked my boyfriend if he loves me. He faltered and replied, "Uh, my dick does." FML

#21180513
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49812) - you deserved it (8190)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:33am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at a bar, when a heavily drunk guy came up to me and slurred "Fuucckkk lady, your face... not even with beer goggles!" FML

#21153496
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51033) - you deserved it (5333)

On 05/27/2014 at 3:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

#21147237
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49891) - you deserved it (4241)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56271) - you deserved it (20307)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband and I had some bath time to ourselves. After having sex, he decided to put bath salts in my vagina to spice things up for the next round. It's been twenty minutes out of the bath and it still feels like there are pop rocks in my vagina. FML

#21101391
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48905) - you deserved it (35740)

On 03/31/2014 at 10:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving through the mountains and there was a chain requirement. I went to put them on and found a note where my chains used to be saying, "Have fun in a blizzard now bitch" from my ex. FML

#21062139
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43032) - you deserved it (6446)

On 02/16/2014 at 2:37am - misc - by snowlover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom made a Facebook status about me: "My daughter is on her rags and won't shut the fuck up #annoyingbitch". FML

#21057121
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51096) - you deserved it (8545)

On 02/11/2014 at 11:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, it's my 8 year anniversary. My boyfriend's "romantic" gesture for the occasion was to toss a few McDonald's coupons at me and tell me to get whatever I wanted. FML

#21044284
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46875) - you deserved it (7141)

On 01/29/2014 at 4:28pm - love - by CUNTCUNTCUNT (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



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