About Blackwidowtaco
Shit happens.
Blackwidowtaco - Followers
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Blackwidowtaco's FML badges
  • The Mixer

    You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
  • The rules are the rules

    Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
  • Work is a 4-letter word

    Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
  • Checking you out

    You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
  • I’m your new creative director

    You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
  • FAAAAAACEBOOK

    Your FML account is now linked to your Facebook account.
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
  • What'ch'all looking at?

    You have put three pictures on your profile, but not necessarily pictures of your profile.
  • I'm an early bird, but no worm yet

    You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 a.m.
  • Night owl

    You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.
  • Santa Claus

    You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
  • Inception

    You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return, you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
  • I like your style

    You gave a Hug to someone. How cute!
  • Socialite

    You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
  • I moderated this!

    In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
  • Consolation prize

    Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • Profile completed

    You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
  • Beginner

    You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
  • Perfectionist

    Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • 50 quality comments

    Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    3%
  • 42

    See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Happy ending

    Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
    0%
  • Tweet, tweet

    You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.
    0%
  • Tell us what happened next

    You've commented on an FML that you sent in
    0%
  • Picture this FML

    You left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.
    0%
  • I liked to the power of 20

    You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.
    90%
  • My diary is a collector's item

    There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
The list of badges to find
Blackwidowtaco's favorite FMLs

Today, I managed to score a date for the first time in over a year, and was very nervous. When I was asked what I do for a living, I laughed nervously, and then blurted out, "Finger women." What I was trying to jokingly say was that I'm a gynecologist. FML

By notapervert / Thursday 28 February 2013 07:57 / United States - Santa Rosa

Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML

By parental failure - / Sunday 3 March 2013 17:03 / Canada - Langley

Today, I told my mom that I heard something, and I think we have rats in the attic and should hire an exterminator. She looked at me and said, "Rats, huh? That's what the mom in The Exorcist thought, but it turned out to be the devil living up there." FML

By jkbeynon / Sunday 3 March 2013 04:18 / United States - Canyon Country

Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML

By assoutofuandme - / Thursday 14 February 2013 07:39 / United States - San Francisco

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML

By daniel55 - / Monday 18 February 2013 00:11 / United Kingdom - London