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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I took my four year old son to the playground. When it was time to go, he squirmed out of my arms back to the jungle gym. Not being the type of mother to put up with bad behavior, I swatted his rear and told him we had to go. That's when I realized I'd just spanked the wrong child who was wearing the same coat as my son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9941) - you deserved it (30488)
On 11/05/2010 at 1:29pm - kids - by lilmamma - United States (California)
Today, I asked my boyfriend if I could call him "love muffin". He asked if he could call me "muffin top". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7459) - you deserved it (21859)
On 11/04/2010 at 4:30pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I made salmon patties and boiled cabbage. I smelled smoke from my stove burner, but thought I spilled something in the burner. No big deal. Later, this horrible smell started coming from the stove. My husband took the stove apart, only to find that I had fried a mouse as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19310) - you deserved it (2516)
On 11/04/2010 at 11:17am - misc - by Whitley - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my girlfriend of two years dumped me, because I'd changed too much for her to bear, and I was breaking her heart. How did I change? I got braces. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25057) - you deserved it (2130)
On 11/04/2010 at 11:04am - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, a grasshopper jumped into my car. As my boyfriend swiped at it, the grasshopper jumped onto my chest and into my shirt. Instead of helping me get it out, my boyfriend leaned back and said, "It got to second base faster than I did." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19783) - you deserved it (7248)
On 09/14/2010 at 3:27am - love - by tickyette (woman) - United States
Today, I met a new guy at work who would not stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me he was her husband. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30404) - you deserved it (1903)
On 09/14/2010 at 12:15am - work - by lifeguardlechery (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I was woken up by my sister and her husband pretending to make moaning sounds in the room next to mine. I began to make moaning sounds as well to fight back. It turns out the "moaning" was actually their dogs snoring down stairs. Breakfast was awkward. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7141) - you deserved it (22245)
On 09/06/2010 at 1:02pm - intimacy - by jackson (man) - United States (California)
Today, after going on a blind date with a man I had met on facebook, we decided to go back to his apartment. All was going good until he took off his pants, only to reveal that he was wearing a diaper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30282) - you deserved it (13462)
On 09/06/2010 at 3:37am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)
Today, I found out that whenever my best friend used to say she wanted to do my dad, she wasn't kidding. She accomplished her mission in my bed after school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43549) - you deserved it (3000)
On 09/01/2010 at 7:10am - intimacy - by fmlskank93 - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was watching a movie at my girlfriend's house with her and her parents. There was a part where a brother and sister kissed, so I said "where'd they come from, Alabama?" Today is also the day I found out my girlfriend's parents are from Alabama. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8106) - you deserved it (22265)
On 05/23/2010 at 7:15pm - misc - by THANKS4theINFO (man) - United States (New Jersey)
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