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babalooisbabaloo's favorite FMLs
by anonymous / 10/09/2012 at 1:53am / United States / Kids
by LovedByFamily / 10/08/2012 at 11:08am / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Miscellaneous
Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML
by stoych / 10/08/2012 at 3:14am / United Kingdom / Love
Today, I wanted to surprise my long distance girlfriend by flying to her unannounced. When I arrived at her house, her family tells me that she herself boarded an unannounced flight to where I lived hours ago. Surprise. FML
by Jex / 10/06/2012 at 6:04am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love
by Valentine_Beauty / 10/06/2012 at 4:58am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Chamorru / 10/04/2012 at 5:33am / United States / Health
by staticman101 / 10/03/2012 at 11:14pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/01/2012 at 7:15pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Love
by fiftyno / 10/01/2012 at 11:02am / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said "I can't do this any more" and pulled out. After repeatedly asking him what was wrong, he basically told me that I suck in bed. Apparently, the way I "just lie there" makes him feel like a necrophile. FML
by Anonymous / 09/28/2012 at 5:22pm / Canada / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/28/2012 at 2:06pm / Netherlands (Gelderland) / Intimacy
by / 09/26/2012 at 10:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, one of my regulars approached me at work, arms extended for a hug. He's always in a bad mood, so I figured for once he wasn't grumpy and I enthusiastically hugged him. Turns out he was just stretching his arms. He told me I was crazy and pretty much ran out of my store. FML
by MLAA / 09/24/2012 at 8:52pm / United States (California) / Work
by Alright. / 09/24/2012 at 4:15am / United States (Montana) / Love
Today, I was scheduled for an interview at a local firm owned by two partners. The secretary told me to be there at around 12:00 to 12:30 pm, so I arrived at 12:15. The first boss told me off for being early, the other one yelled at me for being late. FML
by whatisthisidonteven / 09/23/2012 at 5:23am / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Work
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…