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Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20931) - you deserved it (4129)
On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my college class was talking about Felix Baumgartner, who jumped from the edge of space down to earth. A boy suddenly put his head up and said in a serious tone, "I thought he jumped from the moon?" Several girls concurred. This is my generation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18126) - you deserved it (1191)
Today, at the age of 57, my dad got a unicorn tattooed on his shoulder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15917) - you deserved it (2686) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 10/17/2012 at 1:18am - love - by Anonymous - France (Bretagne)
Today, at a family reunion, we all squeezed in for a picture. I set the self-timer and ran to get in it. 2 seconds before the picture went off, some guy came up, stole the camera, and ran away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18265) - you deserved it (1350)
On 10/15/2012 at 3:57pm - money - by Pissed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, the power went out at school. If it's out for more than twenty minutes, standard procedure is to let us go home. They came back on almost nineteen minutes later. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19113) - you deserved it (2784)
On 10/15/2012 at 3:00pm - work - by anon - United States (Virginia)
Today, I told my daughter that she won't be going to her homecoming dance as punishment for her terrible grades. She's been crying and singing "If I Die Young" in her room for hours. At this point, I don't know if I need to call a therapist or a vocal coach. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19414) - you deserved it (6715)
On 10/15/2012 at 12:07am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was babysitting four kids. I turned the TV on for them, and set the youngest on my lap. She started giggling and pointing at every single pimple I have, exclaiming "Boo-boo!" This went on for half an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13069) - you deserved it (1774)
On 10/13/2012 at 7:22am - kids - by Shiverice - United States (Michigan)
Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12432) - you deserved it (1647)
On 10/11/2012 at 1:08am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20706) - you deserved it (3456)
On 10/10/2012 at 4:43am - animals - by assholecat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my wedding ring went missing. Later, my 3-year-old came to me crying, he'd got it stuck on his penis. When I tried to get it off, he peed on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25716) - you deserved it (2425)
On 10/09/2012 at 1:53am - kids - by anonymous - United States
Today, I found out that my mom gives my brother tips on how to hurt my feelings the most. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22420) - you deserved it (1225)
On 10/08/2012 at 11:08am - misc - by LovedByFamily (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19108) - you deserved it (3448)
On 10/08/2012 at 3:14am - love - by stoych (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I wanted to surprise my long distance girlfriend by flying to her unannounced. When I arrived at her house, her family tells me that she herself boarded an unannounced flight to where I lived hours ago. Surprise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26858) - you deserved it (3094)
On 10/06/2012 at 6:04am - love - by Jex (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I wore a dress that I bought last weekend to work, thinking how I liked it and it fitted me perfectly, until someone at work told me that I was actually wearing a nightie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8167) - you deserved it (13013)
On 10/06/2012 at 4:58am - misc - by Valentine_Beauty (woman) - United States
Today, I have so much ass-acne that it hurts to sit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21125) - you deserved it (4033)
On 10/04/2012 at 5:33am - health - by Chamorru (man) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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