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Zhilla

Offline (the 01/24/2015 at 5:55pm) | Search for a member

Zhilla

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Wales, United Kingdom
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1317
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Zhilla's page activity

Visits<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 6:56pm<b>olpally</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 1:38pm<b>gladlily</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 8:38pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 4:42pm<b>supernaturalcat</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 8:29pm<b>cookies61889</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 9:07pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 7:37pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 1:36pm<b>R5luver</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 9:15pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 2:32pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 3:53pm<b>jonmar51596</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 1:27pm<b>fuckyourlifeOP</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 5:00am<b>lennelleong</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 2:07pm

Zhilla's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of Zhilla's badges

Zhilla's favorite FMLs

Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML

#21342882
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29231) - you deserved it (4070)

On 01/23/2015 at 1:12pm - misc - by Annomymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, while trying to take a crap, I shut the bathroom door. A minute later, my 3 year old daughter knocked and said "Mommy, do you wanna build a snowman?" She kept singing the song until I was finally done. FML

#21341221
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29550) - you deserved it (4208)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:05pm - kids - by frozenpoo - United States

Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML

#21313211
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37738) - you deserved it (3612)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:54pm - kids - by terdberglerforlyfe (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I was studying for my Spanish midterm nonstop. After I closed my book, I was so tired that I thought that my cat was asking me questions in Spanish. FML

#21303629
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28489) - you deserved it (3269)

On 11/21/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Studying is for crazy people. - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML

#21241441
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46184) - you deserved it (6566)

On 08/20/2014 at 2:07am - intimacy - by Mia (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42163) - you deserved it (5977)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43317) - you deserved it (27640)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, I woke up to an old lady right outside my open window, saying "Hello in there! Are you sleepy?" I was so startled that I answered her. She screamed. Turns out she's my neighbour's elderly mother, didn't know I was in there, and was talking to my cat. FML

#21201617
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42948) - you deserved it (4303)

On 07/07/2014 at 11:59am - animals - by ADanceWithDavos (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my little sister started freaking out, because she was playing with some white-out eraser and got some on her finger. She started crying inconsolably because she thought her entire finger was going to disappear. FML

#21198613
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38968) - you deserved it (4132)

On 07/04/2014 at 3:41pm - kids - by neryc (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML

#21182241
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51139) - you deserved it (5921)

On 06/20/2014 at 7:03pm - health - by legitfile.bat.virus.exe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my roommate's pets conspired against me. "The dog ate my homework" has apparently become too clichéd for them. The new excuses are, "My cat chewed through my laptop power cable" and "the gecko ate my pen drive." FML

#21171341
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40770) - you deserved it (4432)

On 06/11/2014 at 8:00pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I took some heavy pain medication before calling my boyfriend. I don't remember the call, but apparently confessed to really liking corn, and faking orgasms. FML

#21165912
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45484) - you deserved it (14288)

On 06/07/2014 at 9:31am - intimacy - by Screwed (woman) - Australia

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

#21158688
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46793) - you deserved it (5194)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:53pm - animals - by disturbed - Ireland



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