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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
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Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25811) - you deserved it (2450)
On 01/26/2013 at 3:44pm - work - by FUCK THE PIGS (man) - United States (California)
Today, I played an intense paintball match, with me and my friends versus my boyfriend and his buddies. When we won, my boyfriend went mental and said he only lost because of "lag". When I pointed out we weren't in a video game, he reacted by firing a paintball straight into my chest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30627) - you deserved it (3978)
On 01/25/2013 at 5:19pm - health - by LagSwitchFTW (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my girlfriend complimented me on my ass. Before I could say thanks, she continued by commenting that she wouldn't mind "breaking it in". FML
I agree, your life sucks (25000) - you deserved it (3951)
On 01/25/2013 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by great (man) - Puerto Rico
Today, I got married. I'm Jewish, and it's traditional to break a glass cup by stepping on it after giving the bride her ring. My brother thought it would be funny to replace the glass cup with a rubber one. I slipped and fell flat on my back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27081) - you deserved it (2604)
On 01/25/2013 at 3:13pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was driving my 9 month pregnant sister around in our golf cart and it died. I had to push it the rest of the way home. She wouldn't stop faking going into labor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23693) - you deserved it (3008)
On 01/25/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by really?!? - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out the hard way that I'm severely allergic to latex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33044) - you deserved it (2712)
On 01/25/2013 at 1:11am - intimacy - by swollenpenis - Canada (Alberta)
Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23313) - you deserved it (5233)
On 01/25/2013 at 12:39am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to buy a birthday present for my boyfriend. While buying him a sweater, the cashier tried to up-sale me by asking if my boyfriend wore briefs or boxers, because both were on sale. Not thinking, I blurted out, "I don't know, they just come off." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21053) - you deserved it (10721)
On 01/25/2013 at 12:31am - misc - by awkwardturtle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I met with my Bolivian friend, who's vacationing here for a few weeks. Eager to show him how welcoming we are in the USA, I took him home and introduced him to my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Bolivia? That's in Europe, right? We saved your asses in World War 2." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23376) - you deserved it (2557)
On 01/24/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by oh ffs (man) - United States
Today, I waited over 30 minutes in freezing cold weather for my bus. When it finally arrived, I went to get on board, but slipped and fell on the icy ground. The driver waited a whole 2 seconds before snorting, "Ain't nobody got time for this shit", closing the doors, and driving off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33118) - you deserved it (2021)
On 01/24/2013 at 4:25pm - misc - by frozensolid (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I took a swig of lemonade from my cup, only to feel something hard in my mouth. Thinking it was a roach or something, I freaked out and spat out the drink. I doused my laptop and soaked myself in the process, only to find out it was a small ice-cube. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7767) - you deserved it (25005)
On 01/24/2013 at 2:53pm - misc - by idiot (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my mom went to court to finalize her divorce. I would have felt sorry for her, had this not been her 7th husband. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28475) - you deserved it (2360)
On 01/24/2013 at 2:19am - misc - by HereWeGoAgain (woman) - United States
Today, I took a taxi ride with my friends. As we were getting out, I paid the taxi driver. With a grin, he drove away fast. It turns out my friend had already paid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23678) - you deserved it (6117)
On 01/23/2013 at 6:33pm - money - by stevenr579 (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my school's theatre decided to produce Les Misérables. I got the part of Éponine. My boyfriend, being a talented performer, could have gotten any part he wanted. However, he only wanted to play the soldier responsible for killing Éponine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24683) - you deserved it (3875)
On 01/23/2013 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum". I'm only 26 years old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31440) - you deserved it (1963)
On 01/22/2013 at 6:16pm - kids - by Female (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Friday 24 May 2013
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