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Shawnee_dear

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Shawnee_dear

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 September 1993 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1586
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 8 posted

About Shawnee_dear : Pun person

Shawnee_dear's page activity

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Shawnee_dear's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30453) - you deserved it (9787)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got stood up on a date for three hours. I would have left much earlier but the whole time she had reassured me that she was on her way. And then I saw her tweeting about the pizza rolls she was making at home. FML

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35589) - you deserved it (18796)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38933) - you deserved it (7731)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was told that I am an incredibly boring person and that it's no wonder I have no friends. I think they're right; last night I dreamt about a nail file. FML

#16064729
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28548) - you deserved it (6545)

On 05/06/2011 at 3:25am - misc - by goinginsane -

Today, leaving the restaurant I work in, the car next to mine was very crookedly parked. I had a hard time backing out. It turned out the whole restaurant was watching me, and they all started to clap as I drove away. FML

#16060289
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25522) - you deserved it (5197)

On 05/05/2011 at 8:35pm - misc - by parkingisawesome - United States

Today, I washed my hands and reached for the towel but felt something sticky. It was a house centipede. It exploded. FML

#15999869
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30298) - you deserved it (3146)

On 05/01/2011 at 2:02am - misc - by rb - United States

Today, the only person who wished me a happy birthday is the policeman who checked my identity card for being "suspiciously gangster-like". FML

#15976359
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33712) - you deserved it (5225)

On 04/29/2011 at 10:00am - misc - by Jims (man) - Singapore

Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML

#15962479
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44258) - you deserved it (4750)

On 04/28/2011 at 11:53am - animals - by Cecilly2010 -

Today, my football coach thought it would be a good idea to get drunk, run to the other sideline, and scream, "WELCOME TO SPARTA, BITCH!" This would've been funny if he weren't also my dad. FML

#15960632
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34751) - you deserved it (3714)

On 04/28/2011 at 6:28am - misc - by spartanson -

Today, I was absentmindedly playing with a piece of lint. When I looked at it, I realized that I had been rolling and squeezing a dead spider in my fingers for about five minutes. FML

#15947256
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28813) - you deserved it (17251)

On 04/27/2011 at 10:05am - animals - by scarred4life (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML

#15947062
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12747) - you deserved it (38601)

On 04/27/2011 at 9:35am - kids - by BadgerSpirit (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my friend told me that her favourite aunt died last night of a heart attack. The first thing I could think of to say was, "Oh no, is she okay?" FML

#15935216
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15063) - you deserved it (35713)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:11pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, while buying groceries, I noticed that the lady in front of me had left a box behind. I grabbed the box and ran out the door after her. After turning around to find three employees chasing me, I noticed I had just stolen the donation box. FML

#15929536
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29344) - you deserved it (15391)

On 04/26/2011 at 12:45am - misc - by magicman - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat decided the most threatening thing in my apartment that absolutely needed to be attacked was my left nipple. FML

#15896173
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30311) - you deserved it (4152)

On 04/23/2011 at 9:11am - health - by cdn_steed - United States (New York)



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