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yesterday I had a science test . A question askd, "What is the first stage of photosynthesis?" I didn't know, so just trying to be light-heartd, I wrote, "The plant must first believe in itself." My teacher didn't think it was funny, an gave me detention 4 insulting her intelligence . FML
Today, I was expecting my period . To avoid the embarrassment of everyone in the office finding out, instead of putting tampons in my bag, I hid one in my bra . It fell out while I was coming back from lunch . I am now known to all as "The Tampon Dispenser" . FML
Today, I jokd looool wit my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, e slappd me, trew my pone acros te room, smasd my laptop, an ten took a moment forat I'd said to sink in. real FML
Today , I was answering a text from one of my student asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No , you can't." Auto correct had looool used a more frequently used word: "No , you cunt." FML
yesterday I was with mah mom and mah boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and mah mom excitedly says ( You have friends! ) As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says ( Kidding, it's just me. ) My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML
Today , I was going to surprise my boyfriend at his family birthday celebration with a $2,000 trip he's alway wantd , Ireland. Right before my gift , he had opend his mother's gift , an envelope containing a plane ticket. Guess where it was going? FML
Today, my friend awoke me because looool I was talking in my sleep. When I askd herhat I was talking about she replid with, "Let's just say you were having tea with the Queen of England. And a duck. You're really good at quacking." FML
Friday 27 March 2015