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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 773
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Philliesfan9391's page activity

Visits<b>carpenoctern</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 1:16am<b>kmccain</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 12:23am<b>bossyass</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 2:11am<b>Allornone</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 1:07pm<b>opis34</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 4:51am<b>EllaJSwiftie</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 6:26am<b>Mrnice</b> - the 08/11/2012 at 5:21am<b>WutzButz</b> - the 02/22/2012 at 11:02am<b>PrimeStarscream</b> - the 01/03/2012 at 2:11am<b>chuckychan</b> - the 08/12/2011 at 2:17pm<b>jerrysatori</b> - the 08/12/2011 at 11:28am<b>VHNox</b> - the 07/21/2011 at 4:44pm

Fucked!<b>carpenoctern</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 7:17am

Philliesfan9391's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!


You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Philliesfan9391's favorite FMLs

Today, I've had chairs thrown at me, kicks have hit me in the nuts and I've heard "I'm gonna fucking kill you, bitch" several times. I work at a kindergarten. And this is a good day compared to what I'm used to. FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2012 at 6:54am / Sweden / Kids

Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML

by bellaskyeb / 01/08/2012 at 12:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

by blegh / 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm / Australia / Health

Today, my boyfriend got drunk and tried to french-kiss my dog. Now he has 12 stitches in his face, and he's insisting we have to get my dog put down. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2011 at 12:03pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals

Today, I was giving an anti-drugs speech to a group of ninth graders. I got onto the topic of trafficking from problem countries and asked a student to point out Mexico City on a map. He hesitated a few seconds before pointing at Canada. What the hell has the education system come to? FML

by jesus christ / 09/30/2011 at 10:55pm / United States / Kids

Today, my mom took me to an AA meeting because she said I needed help. I have never tried alcohol in my life, and told them this. I was then harangued by the "instructor" because apparently one of the signs of alcoholism is denial. FML

by blah / 07/21/2011 at 10:10am / United States / Health