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PenguinBitch

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PenguinBitch

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PenguinBitchPenguinBitch
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 September 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7746
  • Number of comments : 903
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About PenguinBitch : Hello FML'ers. My dream is to reach 1k comments and never come back. I'm playing around, this site it too good to leave. Been here since 2012 and met some interesting users. My favorite user is my good friend Welshite. Well shit, I guess that's all I have to say. You can ask for my Instagram and we can follow and be friends and be..*outside voice* "they don't care you dweeb!!"

HAPPY FML'ling!

PenguinBitch's page activity

Visits<b>PaigeLeeAnn11</b> - 8 minutes ago<b>ez24_</b> - 49 minutes ago<b>Welshite</b> - 2 hours ago<b>Iowagirl93</b> - 2 hours ago<b>Naule</b> - 9 hours ago<b>cutiepie99</b> - 11 hours ago<b>aruam365</b> - 13 hours ago<b>jaegerpilot</b> - 14 hours ago<b>Barrel_rider7</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Nordrag</b> - 16 hours ago<b>Getty95</b> - 17 hours ago<b>totallybananas</b> - yesterday at 7:11am<b>ThatKidFromLA</b> - yesterday at 4:37am<b>hey_brittany_</b> - yesterday at 3:13am<b>AnonymousSpock</b> - yesterday at 8:11pm<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 1:04pm<b>pptm</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:58am<b>ManiBoo</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:38am

Liked!<b>Emi1y</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 7:10am<b>BBlah</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 5:29pm

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PenguinBitch's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was pet-sitting for my boyfriend's parents, one of their dogs killed one of their kittens. FML

#20901891
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47264) - you deserved it (4908)

On 09/30/2013 at 12:23pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML

#20901889
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42308) - you deserved it (7254)

On 09/30/2013 at 12:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, my friends and I spent a little too long enjoying a beautiful cliff overlooking the ocean. We spent the next 3 hours lost in a pitch black jungle with only one pocket-sized flashlight. FML

#20901708
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34204) - you deserved it (11452)

On 09/30/2013 at 7:18am - misc - by sothisishowidie - Guam

Today, my girlfriend walked in on me taking a dump, and started plucking her eyebrows. When I told her I was uncomfortable, she said, "Aww, is my baby's poo shy? Is it, is it?" and pinched my cheek. FML

#20900665
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41090) - you deserved it (6881)

On 09/29/2013 at 3:21pm - misc - by noweddingforyou (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my insane war veteran great-uncle punched me in the throat for not laughing hard enough at his stupid joke. FML

#20898629
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39396) - you deserved it (4476)

On 09/28/2013 at 12:02am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a really important job interview. During it, I accidentally let out a burp, came down with nervous hiccups, and when I tried to quietly ease out some painful gas that was building up, it came out as a massive, rancid fart. I'll definitely be unemployed for a while yet. FML

#20898243
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41302) - you deserved it (9374)

On 09/27/2013 at 5:33pm - work - by ;_;" (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48723) - you deserved it (6371)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the girl I've fallen in love with is a 'young-earth/dinosaurs-lived-with-humans' crackpot. FML

#20896509
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33417) - you deserved it (7184)

On 09/26/2013 at 4:06am - love - by GodSquad (man) - United Kingdom (Blackburn with Darwen)

Today, thanks to Grand Theft Auto, I found myself seriously thinking about holding up an armored bank truck when I saw it in traffic. FML

#20889286
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19097) - you deserved it (33981)

On 09/20/2013 at 6:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after getting back from a year-long world trip, I nearly fell on my knees and cried when I saw boxes of Twinkies at my local gas station. Finding out they were back was the highlight of the year. FML

Today, I called work crying, telling them that I wouldn't be able to go to work tomorrow due to my grandmother's sudden and tragic death. After hanging up, I walked into the midnight release of Grand Theft Auto 5. I had no idea my boss was also an avid gamer. FML

#20884742
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17990) - you deserved it (88746)

On 09/17/2013 at 12:36am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, my self-esteem sank so low that I sabotaged my workplace's corporate network, then fixed it, just so I could feel needed. FML

#20878417
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39725) - you deserved it (6429)

On 09/12/2013 at 3:40pm - work - by sysadmin:~# rm -rf / (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

#20877041
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56208) - you deserved it (9174)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I noticed that my car's passenger-side door has cobwebs all over it. FML

#20876882
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41636) - you deserved it (6514)

On 09/11/2013 at 10:16am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)



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