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PenguinBitch

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PenguinBitch

61Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 November 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13938
  • Number of comments : 1101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About PenguinBitch : Things I enjoy...
-I enjoy paddle boarding every Sunday
-I volunteer at an animal shelter during my free time
-I also partake in fencing and do my share with the community Jazz Club. The enormous lie I'm telling you still doesn't compare to the size of your mom's ass.

PenguinBitch's page activity

Visits<b>Wolfipoo</b> - 8 hours ago<b>karacakal2</b> - 10 hours ago<b>quazimozart</b> - 10 hours ago<b>ilovemonkeybutts</b> - 13 hours ago<b>mrjiggles1992</b> - 15 hours ago<b>terspal</b> - 15 hours ago<b>FuckFace10</b> - 18 hours ago<b>raesos91</b> - 20 hours ago<b>bunnylove483</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 10:00pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 2:14pm<b>stereomommy</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 11:31am<b>sam882</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 10:56am<b>2nd</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 7:04am<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 6:24am<b>prissysgirl16</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 11:47am<b>xWhymex123</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 5:44am<b>saffy66</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 3:23am<b>MatthewDemirjian</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 1:13am

Fucked!<b>karacakal2</b> - 4 hours ago<b>Wolfipoo</b> - 9 hours ago<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 8:14pm<b>starlandmarie</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 2:50am<b>seetei</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 7:14am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 4:48pm<b>whitnayfortooh</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 5:41am<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 1:01am<b>interesting33</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 12:08pm<b>sarcasm_insanity</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 5:17am<b>MaltWarrior</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 6:47am<b>Drarry</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 4:17am<b>LoveNnyl</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 3:25am<b>allykaymorris</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 2:06am<b>skye147</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 12:03am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 12:57am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 8:43pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 9:53pm

PenguinBitch's FML badges

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

Picture this FML

You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

See all of PenguinBitch's badges

PenguinBitch's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the kitchen to grab some cereal. I guess my mum didn't hear me, because as I entered, I heard her ranting to herself about her "God damned fucking cheerios". I started to slowly back out, but I tripped over my own feet. She heard and yelled at me for "sneaking around". FML

#20934627
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32442) - you deserved it (3811)

On 10/26/2013 at 2:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)

Today, I had to call a plumber out to clear a blockage in our bathroom drainpipe. After coming back from work later in the day, and after a tearful confession from my wife, I found out that pipe wasn't the only one he snaked. FML

#20932505
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57508) - you deserved it (3836)

On 10/24/2013 at 4:06pm - misc - by soon to be divorced (man) - United States

Today, I tried to tackle my fear of heights by riding a rollercoaster. Once we were near the top, it malfunctioned, causing it to stop, and we all had to get out and climb back down. My girlfriend laughed at me for how scared I was. FML

#20931509
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45236) - you deserved it (4614)

On 10/23/2013 at 7:16pm - misc - by monsterdanceman (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28408) - you deserved it (40789)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, as I worked as a cashier, two girls came up laughing. I smiled as I rang them up, asking what had made them laugh so hard. One looked me dead in the face and said, "You." They then both walked away, laughing. FML

#20922962
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43155) - you deserved it (3649)

On 10/16/2013 at 5:52pm - work - by amy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it hit me that I'm incredibly pathetic, when at the age of 21, I tucked my stuffed animals into bed with me, facing in different directions so they could keep watch for monsters while I slept. FML

#20922788
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43794) - you deserved it (14514)

On 10/16/2013 at 2:48pm - misc - by SaveMeTeddy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boss brought her cat to work. At one point, I looked up and everyone was staring at me staring at the cat's asshole. FML

#20915004
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34101) - you deserved it (14698)

On 10/10/2013 at 10:11am - animals - by failure (man) - Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, my coworker convinced a little girl that teddy bears are actually the bodies of dead baby bears. I work at Build-a-Bear-Workshop, and we were working a 4-year-old's birthday party. FML

#20910133
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44110) - you deserved it (3015)

On 10/06/2013 at 9:11pm - kids - by TeddyBearKiller (woman) - United States

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML

#20909928
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50743) - you deserved it (3586)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:54pm - love - by UHM (man) - United States

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

#20909921
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59206) - you deserved it (3546)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my new deodorant caused an allergic reaction, covering my armpits in a painful rash. I've had to awkwardly waddle around all day with my arms splayed outwards to get any relief. One customer at work sarcastically mentioned that it's nice that they're hiring penguins these days. FML

#20909610
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39622) - you deserved it (3350)

On 10/06/2013 at 1:40pm - health - by _/ | \_ (woman) - Singapore

Today, I told my coworkers that I was going on a date tonight so they would think I have a social life. One of them spotted me while I was eating alone at McDonalds. FML

Today, as I was walking home, a car drove through a puddle and splashed me like in a cheesy movie. As if that wasn't annoying enough, the driver had to pull over because she was laughing too hard. FML

#20907968
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44217) - you deserved it (3115)

On 10/05/2013 at 2:31am - misc - by CelibateHero (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my psycho ex-girlfriend, who's already made two threats against my life, informed me that she now has a concealed carry permit. FML

#20907451
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43345) - you deserved it (3196)

On 10/04/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML

#20906869
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52889) - you deserved it (7310)

On 10/04/2013 at 4:20am - misc - by f.a.t. (woman) - Australia



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