About PandaFluid : Herp derp. FML is the one app that'll cheer me up no matter how sad I am... Mainly because I know that there are always people who will have worse luck than me. Am I a bad person for laughing at others' misfortunes? I think not.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he reached out onto my dressing table to grab the lube. He missed, and found the hand sanitizer instead. I'm not sure who is in more pain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37385) - you deserved it (6153)
On 01/19/2013 at 8:20am - intimacy - by tingles (woman) - United Kingdom (Solihull)
Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19907) - you deserved it (8949)
On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)
Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19907) - you deserved it (8949)
On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time; he asked me to explain my interest in dating her. In a mix of me trying to say "I want to be with your daughter" and "I want to be in your daughter's life" I got confused and said, "I want to be in your daughter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25755) - you deserved it (5306)
On 12/10/2012 at 2:21am - love - by Tonguetied0496 (man) - United States (California)
Today, I sent in an assignment from my batshit insane teacher. The assignment was to read a poem, analyze it, and make a comic of its plot. This would've been fine if the teacher who assigned it to me didn't teach math. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17698) - you deserved it (1086)
On 12/09/2012 at 10:53pm - work - by bestnameright - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6350) - you deserved it (21359)
On 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)
Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6425) - you deserved it (38700)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33730) - you deserved it (2678)
On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon
Today, I had to take my son to the emergency room for shooting himself in the ass with a BB gun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21974) - you deserved it (3450)
On 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm - kids - by myfamilyisodd (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28763) - you deserved it (18179)
On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24532) - you deserved it (6288)
On 05/09/2011 at 10:34pm - kids - by richkief76 -
Today, I was watching a video about spiders. When I felt a tickle on my foot, I kicked hard in panic. It was one of our newborn kittens walking. I almost killed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11100) - you deserved it (44070)
On 08/26/2010 at 1:33am - animals - by Aaron (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28857) - you deserved it (8551)
On 07/14/2010 at 12:32am - health - by sarah - United States
Today, I realized that not only am I still an unpublished author, but I can't even get an FML posted after submitting several in the last year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26018) - you deserved it (5134)
On 03/13/2010 at 8:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, after reading a sign at the airport, my 6-year-old son thought it would be funny to yell, "Daddy's got a bomb!" Airport security then tackled me to the ground. Oh, and I missed my flight and my mother's birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34477) - you deserved it (2755)
On 01/24/2010 at 9:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Monday 17 June 2013
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