About Omegadolly : If it's a penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, where does the other penny go?
Omegadolly's FML badges
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Omegadolly's favorite FMLs
Today, there must have been a wasp clinging to my front door because when I walked outside, it dropped between my glasses and my face and began stinging me all around my eye. I don't know if my eye is more swollen from the stings or from me repeatedly punching myself in the face. FML
by Screamslikeagirl / 09/27/2016 at 3:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up suddenly with giant bugs biting my legs. I screamed, ripped the blanket off the bed and bolted to the bathroom to recover. Turns out it was all a dream, and the person who needed to recover most was my shell-shocked boyfriend who had been sleeping soundly beside me. Sorry, babe. FML
by sweetdreams / 09/18/2016 at 2:39am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was on a date with a guy I really like. Everything went well, and then he wanted to kiss me. As he leaned towards me, I got slightly panicky and ducked out of the way, causing him to headbutt the car behind me. Now we know why I'm still a virgin. FML
by RhiannonMuh / 09/09/2016 at 4:01pm / Germany (Bayern) / Love
Today, I finally addressed why my boyfriend started calling me "love bug" since we haven't used pet names in the entirety of our 2 year relationship. His response? "because I love you but you bug the shit out of me. It seemed appropriate." FML
by Jaided_Genetics / 08/17/2016 at 12:20am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by TheHeirofTime / 08/15/2016 at 11:11am / United States (Massachusetts) / Health
by an unlucky man / 08/05/2016 at 5:37am / United States (California) / Love
Today, whilst tuning my guitar, one of the steel strings snapped and hit me in the face. Now I'm on my way to my first date with the girl of my dreams, and I'm wearing an eye patch and have a thick red line across my face. FML
by Egtat216 / 07/29/2016 at 6:03pm / United Kingdom (Aberdeen City) / Miscellaneous
Today, my friend and I were brushing our teeth, standing side by side. We both have a sympathy gag reflex. He brushed his tongue and gagged, which caused me to gag. So we had a never ending gag-fest until we both began throwing up and couldn't stop until one of us could manage to hold it in. FML
by StateOfEuphoria / 07/24/2016 at 6:52pm / United States (Mississippi) / Health
by Uh_Oh_Bro / 07/24/2016 at 1:58pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by DidNotExpectThat / 07/18/2016 at 3:30am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Not true / 07/17/2016 at 10:56pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/13/2016 at 8:56pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by MATTY2512 / 07/13/2016 at 2:13pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy
by BaconGirl / 07/08/2016 at 2:00am / Work
- 1Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 2Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 3Today, I'm still reeling over the unexpected loss of my co-worker. I also received a notification…