About Omegadolly : If it's a penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, where does the other penny go?
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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Omegadolly's favorite FMLs
by an unlucky man / 08/05/2016 at 5:37am / United States (California) / Love
Today, whilst tuning my guitar, one of the steel strings snapped and hit me in the face. Now I'm on my way to my first date with the girl of my dreams, and I'm wearing an eye patch and have a thick red line across my face. FML
by Egtat216 / 07/29/2016 at 6:03pm / United Kingdom (Aberdeen City) / Miscellaneous
Today, my friend and I were brushing our teeth, standing side by side. We both have a sympathy gag reflex. He brushed his tongue and gagged, which caused me to gag. So we had a never ending gag-fest until we both began throwing up and couldn't stop until one of us could manage to hold it in. FML
by StateOfEuphoria / 07/24/2016 at 6:52pm / United States (Mississippi) / Health
by Uh_Oh_Bro / 07/24/2016 at 1:58pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by DidNotExpectThat / 07/18/2016 at 3:30am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Not true / 07/17/2016 at 10:56pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/13/2016 at 8:56pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by MATTY2512 / 07/13/2016 at 2:13pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy
Today, marks three days since I was supposed to follow the moving truck to my new home. Instead, I got super sick and my dad drove away without me. I've been laying on a dog cushion the entire weekend because my bed is 500 miles away. FML
by PlzSendBlankets / 06/26/2016 at 10:00pm / United States (Missouri) / Health
Today, I heard someone try to get into my back garden. I ran to the front door, opened it and shouted at whoever it was. I then saw a police officer appear, following the person who'd jumped my fence. I then realised I wasn't wearing any trousers. I'd shouted at the police half naked. FML
by Sammmmi / 06/22/2016 at 2:35pm / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, after two weeks of trying to convince my parents to go to my high school graduation. They finally gave in. After they handed me my diploma, they decided to leave because it was "too boring." I'm currently sitting on the curb of the street waiting for my Uber, while people take pictures of me. FML
by Mexican / 06/18/2016 at 11:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, five minutes into a first date with a woman I really wanted to impress, we got on to a very busy train. I was so concerned with making sure that my backpack didn't get caught in the closing doors that I forgot to worry about my head. FML
by dannidoll93 / 06/15/2016 at 7:56am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Transportation
Today, I was using the restroom at a gas station when someone hurriedly knocked on the door. Thinking that it was my sister, I playfully said, "Hold up, hoe!" I opened the door to see a goth woman with an edgy haircut giving me a death stare. FML
by Watsausrname / 06/13/2016 at 10:31pm / Miscellaneous
Today, my wife said she was going to her friend's place to help her with couponing. She started getting ready at 5pm; shaved her legs, did her hair, put on skin-tight leggings and a low-cut top. Left at 6pm, snuck back in at 2:50am. Shit, couponing must be really exciting. FML
by Anonymous / 06/11/2016 at 1:15am / United States (New York) / Love