Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Omegadolly

Online | Search for a member

Omegadolly

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 June 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3992
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Omegadolly : If it's a penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, where does the other penny go?

Omegadolly's page activity

Visits<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 12:18pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 9:07pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 6:28pm<b>YoshiEgg</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 10:04am<b>maddiemae99</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 12:49am<b>Narttu</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 3:57pm<b>LowExpectations</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 4:54pm<b>birdbirdbiiiird</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 12:25pm<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 1:11am<b>hghrider123456</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 6:22pm<b>RedX1000FML</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 10:44pm<b>AboveAll04</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 4:07am<b>carcinogenic</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 2:40am<b>profligatesoul</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 7:57am<b>Bart_Simpson</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 9:33pm

Omegadolly's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Omegadolly's badges

Omegadolly's favorite FMLs

Today, I managed to punch a customer's child as he walked around the corner just as I enthusiastically pointed his mother in the direction of what she was looking for. FML

#21217892
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29044) - you deserved it (2858)

On 07/23/2014 at 12:04am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend reckoned that he has a better sleep when he falls asleep with his hand on either my boobs or my ass. I kind of just laughed it off. I later discovered he's 100% correct when he put his hand on my butt, and not five minutes later was snoring. FML

#21217074
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33038) - you deserved it (5428)

On 07/22/2014 at 4:44am - love - by and the truth comes out (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mom told me my relationship is a joke, because teenagers don't understand the meaning of relationships and commitment. I couldn't help but remind her how she's divorced three separate men to date. She hit me over the head so hard that snot flew out of my nose. FML

#21213268
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47587) - you deserved it (8965)

On 07/18/2014 at 7:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw a drunk woman drop her purse in the street. I picked it up and went to give it to her, only for her to scream at me for being a thief. Then she started crying, apologized and hugged me, then got angry again, and finally threw up on me. FML

#21208109
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44558) - you deserved it (3720)

On 07/13/2014 at 5:14pm - misc - by all puked out (man) - Netherlands

Today, I was interviewing a woman for a job. She told me that she may need days off because of her artistic son. I jokingly replied, "Does he color on the walls or something?" She then stared at me with a weird look on her face. Autistic, her son is autistic. FML

#21205262
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37172) - you deserved it (19334)

On 07/10/2014 at 6:17pm - work - by dammit hearing aid - United States (Iowa)

Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML

#21202372
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40945) - you deserved it (2990)

On 07/08/2014 at 12:26am - work - by MaddyN - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

#21200680
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50300) - you deserved it (7528)

On 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by oh shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54374) - you deserved it (5140) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I looked at my bank balance. It read $1.23. That's higher than it usually is. FML

#21185584
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39912) - you deserved it (7708)

On 06/23/2014 at 5:26pm - money - by amused (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I heard my husband say from outside, "Seriously Dan, what could go wrong?" This was followed a few seconds later by a bang and screaming. Turns out he'd tried to smash his head through a wooden plank like a martial artist and failed. He ended up with splinters and a concussion. FML

#21182978
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39598) - you deserved it (4754)

On 06/21/2014 at 11:15am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a fly landed on my face. Before I could even react, my brother "helpfully" punched it hard enough to both kill the fly and knock me out. FML

#21182108
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41705) - you deserved it (4242)

On 06/20/2014 at 5:00pm - health - by blackchin III (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, my life is so boring that I started looking through my can of coins and sorting them out by year. The oldest coin I have is from 1963. FML

#21181414
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38102) - you deserved it (8206)

On 06/20/2014 at 1:05am - misc - by Gibbster_ (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to see the photos of my wedding, which he didn't bother to come to. Reply: "What the fuck, are you gay or something? Keep that homo stuff to yourself." My wife started laughing so hard she was crying. FML

#21180887
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44638) - you deserved it (4635)

On 06/19/2014 at 5:05pm - love - by Fuck you, Dad. Fuck you. (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, at my first day working at Walmart, a customer asked if we have any egg cookers. I said I wasn't sure, but that I'd be "eggstatic" to go ask for him. The first clue I got to suggest he hated puns was him yelling "Don't get smart with me, boy!" and then threatening to kill me. FML

#21180841
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40825) - you deserved it (9209)

On 06/19/2014 at 4:10pm - work - by fuckmyjob (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

#21180516
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48696) - you deserved it (13624)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:37am - love - by stopinthenameoflove - Ireland (Dublin)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: