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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, while shopping for some bananas at my local grocery store, an old woman came up to me and started rubbing my stomach. She simply asked when I was due. I am a 43 year old man with a beer belly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27726) - you deserved it (10478)
On 10/24/2009 at 6:24pm - misc - by fmlifetime (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower, instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25627) - you deserved it (6421)
On 10/24/2009 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by sad_dad (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower, instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25627) - you deserved it (6421)
On 10/24/2009 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by sad_dad (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I discovered that when you're the maid of honor giving a toast at your best friend's wedding, it's important to make sure the zipper on your dress is secured. Otherwise, your bare breasts and Hello Kitty panties could end up exposed to a wedding party of 600 people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33508) - you deserved it (6171)
On 10/24/2009 at 12:11pm - misc - by meg265 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was playing Farmville all day, and I was really into the game. I was getting phone calls all day, but I kept ignoring them cause I was making so much Farm Money. Come to find out it was my son's school. He fell off the jungle gym and broke his arm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4903) - you deserved it (91217)
On 10/24/2009 at 3:25am - kids - by stewhart (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I found a dead puppy in my backyard. I have never owned any pets. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30809) - you deserved it (1482)
On 10/23/2009 at 10:59pm - misc - by WhyMe (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I played with the white dust on the counter at work for the last time. After a couple of weeks of arriving to a thin coating of dust over the counter, and drawing in it, piling it up and other such fun things, I met the guy who now does the earlier shift. He has a huge, dandruffy beard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25448) - you deserved it (9921)
On 10/22/2009 at 5:24pm - work - by JustEwww (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I went to drop the garbage in the compactor as I left to do some shopping. I quickly put my handbag down on the side, threw the 'garbage' in the machine, watched it do its thing, and then turned round to find... the bag of garbage on the side. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8638) - you deserved it (23265)
On 10/22/2009 at 1:20pm - misc - by Typrokka (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, I found out my mom is the nude model for an art class at my college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44912) - you deserved it (2046)
On 10/22/2009 at 8:30am - misc - by scarred - Sent from mobile version
Today, I decided to take a personal day from class and e-mailed all of my profs saying I had flu symptoms. While standing in line at Starbucks later, someone behind me says "Glad you're feeling better. Hope you can attend class tomorrow, we'll discuss lying." It was my Ethics professor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4939) - you deserved it (38655)
On 10/20/2009 at 10:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I heard my newly divorced parents fighting about who gets to keep me. Neither of them want me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50335) - you deserved it (2783)
On 10/19/2009 at 7:50am - misc - by cc10 (woman) - China (Beijing)
Today, I got diagnosed with a condition that expresses itself in the form of violent diarrhea whenever I get nervous. Now I am constantly nervous about getting nervous about anything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35324) - you deserved it (1731)
On 10/18/2009 at 9:36am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Norrbottens Lan)
Today, I got diagnosed with a condition that expresses itself in the form of violent diarrhea whenever I get nervous. Now I am constantly nervous about getting nervous about anything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35324) - you deserved it (1731)
On 10/18/2009 at 9:36am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Norrbottens Lan)
Today, I realized that choosing to live in the honors dorms was a terrible mistake. Quiet hours start at 6 PM and the only exception is if you are a member of the university marching band, which means you can practice your instrument at anytime in the lounge... located next to my room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21186) - you deserved it (3476)
On 10/15/2009 at 7:17pm - misc - by Matt (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I noticed a dent in the passenger door of my car. At first I blamed it on the door of another car. Then I remembered that my last passenger hadn't shut the door all the way, and I insisted on "showing him how it's done" by hip-checking the door shut. The dent perfectly fits my butt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3486) - you deserved it (22534)
On 10/15/2009 at 1:41pm - misc - by onei8785 (woman) - United States (New York)
Friday 24 May 2013
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