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NeatNit

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NeatNit
  • Town/Country : Israel
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 8287
  • Number of comments : 731
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

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NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, while stuck in a traffic jam, my son silently changed my gear to reverse. FML

#15248759
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35332) - you deserved it (6150)

On 03/09/2011 at 4:52am - kids - by Anonymous - India (Karnataka)

Today, it's official, we measured. My boyfriend's manboobs are bigger than my breasts. FML

#15225525
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42841) - you deserved it (8213)

On 03/07/2011 at 1:16am - health - by tinygirl -

Today, a spider dangled an inch away from my face while I was driving. I freaked out and accidentally bumped the car in front of me. Three cops arrived on the scene and I had to explain to them what happened. I can still hear them laughing. FML

#15221957
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22686) - you deserved it (7460)

On 03/06/2011 at 8:48pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I looked in my mouse's cage and noticed a tiny weed growing. I've been trying to grow a garden for years to no avail. Even my mouse is a better gardener than I am. FML

#15104344
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19645) - you deserved it (9563)

On 02/24/2011 at 6:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was forced to attend a fire safety class, as required by my job. Last year, I completed the fire academy as a volunteer fireman. The class was not only insulting, but wrong in many ways. I got kicked out for pointing them out. I now have to take it again, or be fired. FML

#15020187
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20185) - you deserved it (4217)

On 02/17/2011 at 8:47pm - work - by peeved (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I made the discovery that I'm in a true love triangle; both of my girlfriends are dating one another. FML

#14948891
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12834) - you deserved it (57357)

On 02/12/2011 at 11:52am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my dad ate my pet rabbit two years ago. He said he ran away. FML

#14847630
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40774) - you deserved it (2936)

On 02/05/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I bought a pretty blue parakeet to keep my parrot company, and named her Sky. I went to work a few hours later. When I came home that night, I found my parrot dead. There wasn't a huge mess to clean, though; Sky had already eaten half of his corpse. FML

#14843192
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26296) - you deserved it (6374)

On 02/04/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by omnomnom (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67078) - you deserved it (6317)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to the park and sat down on a bench to enjoy my coffee. I heard a few young girls behind me talking about how their first experience of sex was. I turned around to see how old these girls really were. One of them was my daughter. FML

#14737614
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54012) - you deserved it (6432)

On 01/27/2011 at 10:35pm - intimacy - by JordanVilleneuve (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38060) - you deserved it (25746) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, at work, I was asked to sharpen some pencils. I'm an electronics and mechanics engineer, and while I understand it's been quite a while since I was in primary school, I still wonder why my boss felt the need to explain in minute detail how to sharpen a pencil. FML

#14494219
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21181) - you deserved it (2432)

On 01/07/2011 at 4:11am - work - by dibman (man) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I realized that I'll have to explain to my child that mommy and daddy met on World of Warcraft. FML

#14376347
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14049) - you deserved it (47170)

On 12/29/2010 at 12:20am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of almost two years proposed to me. Everything was perfect. The ring was beautiful. And seconds after I said yes he went to play his new xbox game. FML

#14174315
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29488) - you deserved it (7028)

On 12/12/2010 at 1:08am - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my daughter told my son that Santa is not real. Of course, being a child, he started to cry. My only problem is, my son is 11 and my daughter is 6. FML

#14120068
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28379) - you deserved it (4844)

On 12/07/2010 at 1:25pm - kids - by Cherie - United States (New York)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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