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NeatNit

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NeatNit
  • Town/Country : Israel
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 8509
  • Number of comments : 733
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

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NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

#17032745
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8565) - you deserved it (58563) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for 3 years. She's pregnant. I'm a virgin. FML

#17023153
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45915) - you deserved it (8356)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:19am - love - by Nick (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because apparently my mom hates him and doesn't want us to be together. My mom died six years ago. FML

#17019799
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42077) - you deserved it (2614)

On 07/07/2011 at 9:28pm - love - by anonbob (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I was propositioned by an incredibly pretty girl. I'm a 24 year old virgin; she's my best mate's girlfriend. She tells him everything when drunk, and he's a black-belt in karate. This could officially be classified as torture. FML

#17012885
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31632) - you deserved it (5238)

On 07/07/2011 at 10:40am - love - by Junktown (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I went out drinking with my friends. Being safe as we were a little intoxicated, we took a taxi back. The cab driver was also drunk. FML

#17000243
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35980) - you deserved it (3228)

On 07/06/2011 at 1:06pm - misc - by THOMASisMYname - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to sift through hundreds of pages of legal documents. They were all written in Comic Sans font. FML

#16984657
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28401) - you deserved it (3063)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:04am - work - by chawlay (man) - United States (New York)

Today, for breakfast, there were scrambled eggs, boiled eggs, bacon, sausages, fresh bread, croissants, brownies, donuts, fruit smoothie, coffee, tea and orange juice. Too bad no one bothered wake me up. FML

#16969681
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32386) - you deserved it (9113)

On 07/04/2011 at 3:27am - misc - by Gustav Fjorder - Switzerland

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

#16912974
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59495) - you deserved it (6231)

On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

#16892674
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39980) - you deserved it (3586)

On 06/28/2011 at 2:39am - intimacy - by girlshavepenises (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37579) - you deserved it (15286)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, as I passed my fiancé the pancakes I had just made, he vocalised his happiness with a groan that was EXACTLY like the one he makes when we have sex. So on a sexiness rating, I'm a pancake. FML

#16830910
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32131) - you deserved it (9319)

On 06/24/2011 at 6:45am - intimacy - by Eve (woman) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, it was my first day at my new job. My new boss asked me if I was single. After telling him I have been happily married for 6 years, he fired me on the spot. FML

#16793164
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46197) - you deserved it (3247)

On 06/22/2011 at 1:35am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I made the long drive to work, got out of the car, and realised that I'd forgotten to put shoes on before I left the house. FML

#16715265
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13341) - you deserved it (27672)

On 06/17/2011 at 5:24pm - misc - by Hannah - Ireland (Sligo)

Today, I dropped my camera into water. The good news is that it's waterproof. The bad news is I dropped it off London Bridge. All the pictures and videos of my four-month trip around Europe were on it. FML

#16708648
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37030) - you deserved it (8417)

On 06/17/2011 at 7:32am - misc - by catherine - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boss gave me an "All you need to know about grammar" book. FML

#16704546
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8279) - you deserved it (26883)

On 06/17/2011 at 12:16am - work - by illiterate - Australia (New South Wales)



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