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NeatNit

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NeatNit
  • Town/Country : Israel
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 8324
  • Number of comments : 731
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

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NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom took me to an AA meeting because she said I needed help. I have never tried alcohol in my life, and told them this. I was then harangued by the "instructor" because apparently one of the signs of alcoholism is denial. FML

#17202338
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31027) - you deserved it (2565)

On 07/21/2011 at 10:10am - health - by blah (man) - United States

Today, my dad came home and said that he was so inspired by hip hop dancers on TV that he decided to take a hip hop dance class. He signed up for the class that my girlfriend teaches. FML

#17201461
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30735) - you deserved it (3313)

On 07/21/2011 at 7:14am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46701) - you deserved it (7666)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML

#17182524
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30717) - you deserved it (6744)

On 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31797) - you deserved it (7250)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)

Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML

#17134448
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35159) - you deserved it (3907)

On 07/16/2011 at 9:28am - kids - by Rejected (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was on the elevator at work. As it descended, a roach started scurrying about around my feet. I freaked out and started screaming, hitting the panic button without thinking. Now I'm facing a hefty fine for using the panic button when there wasn't a "real" emergency. FML

#17125481
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9825) - you deserved it (36949)

On 07/15/2011 at 6:24pm - work - by Meg - United States (Florida)

Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML

#17113139
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13845) - you deserved it (61779)

On 07/14/2011 at 9:51pm - kids - by anon (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the whole family came together to celebrate my grandmother's 80th birthday. My grandfather read a poem he'd written about how he had taken my grandmother's virginity 60 years ago. It went on for about 30 minutes. FML

#17104731
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28243) - you deserved it (2155)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Austria

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
502 comments

I agree, your life sucks (117079) - you deserved it (5933)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
502 comments

I agree, your life sucks (117079) - you deserved it (5933)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my boyfriend his shirt and pants did not match and that he should change for dinner. All my belongings are now on the sidewalk. FML

#17089310
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23375) - you deserved it (36091)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:40am - love - by whyme - United States (California)

Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML

#17088457
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28837) - you deserved it (6174)

On 07/13/2011 at 12:43am - kids - by ohno - United States (Colorado)

Today, my father spent half an hour trying to convert my cat to Christianity. He has already done this with my other two cats. He's completely serious and thinks they are born-again Christians. FML

#17072330
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27739) - you deserved it (2605)

On 07/11/2011 at 10:15pm - animals - by CatOwner (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I realized that my wife is such a bitch normally, she's actually nicer when she is on her period. FML

#17035825
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29332) - you deserved it (6781)

On 07/09/2011 at 12:32am - misc - by Username - United States



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